Tuesday, December 27, 2016

26 - 12 -'16       Run 1820       Committee Run

The walk you have when no-one's there to run. The Bar "dropped to 
the ground" with a resounding "twang" with no GM NUMMY, but 
only 1 of the Committee - Hash Cash DUMBER as the proxy 
(or was that poxy ??) to run the show. We could only manage a 
four'm, not a quorum, & were over-run 10:1 by the visiting Jazz
Conventioners (eers) at REAR ENTRY's office - the Miner's Tavern. 
PLUCKA had it right with her quip " at least the best looking ones
made it !!"
The 4 lonely Hashers looking for a life - DUMB & DUMBER, FLUID
MOVEMENT, PLUCKA & BAD HEAD JOB headed off on the 3/4 hour
walk, where the first stop was an on back/security check & to put
out the bins at the sheltered workshop.
With no drink-stop on the walk, we were soon back at the 'on after'
with no charges or down downs, but we did have one on the 
Committee (thanks DUMB), & at least we were able to talk about
everyone & anyone who wasn't there. 
Special mention to BOOTROOTA after his surgery, & for a speedy 
recovery.
We went our separate ways around 9pm, while BHD shon up the 
Convention Badge to head off for a week of serious jazz listening.

Happy New Year to all.

Next week's run - LOIS LANE's.

Monday, December 19, 2016

19 - 12 -'16         Run 1801      Christmas Run

On On from The Sheltered Workshop, with 30 or so starters.
GM NUM welcomed back HYMEN ( & MOUNTIE's wet already).
Welcome to BOOBS & BUNDIE - visitors from Noosa.
A drink for all to start off, & the 1st carol - Little Drummer Boy
for DUMBER & DUMB. HEAD HUNTER had a huge smile - never 
heard such endearing lyrics in a Christmas Carol.
First stop - upstairs at the newly named Sporting Globe Hotel,
where HYMIE copped an abalone clam on his face from MOUNTIE,
and BOOBS & BUNDIE had a drink for planning to stay in the
Aldi Carpark. NORMAL was stand in to take a Carol & drink, 
for the absent PEBBLES' schlong (.... but doesn't everyone say
"NORMAL's a C**t ??).
Next stop the Miner's Tavern & we run into the short cutting B's,
PUSBUCKET, SPARTACUS, REAR ENTRY & ROAD RUNNER.
REAR ENTRY's Carol says "he doesn't care which hole he's in".
QUICK DICK had a drink for shagging HEAD HUNTER (in the words
of the Carol) "in the Icelandic way, giving QUICK DICK great delight",
but all dicks drink together - enter HALF A BAR.
Onwards to STUBBY's Athletic Club Bar and PLUCKA's Carol,
"cause PLUCKA DUCK comes tonight" - (we wonder), then
MRS DICKHEAD "made a little squeak, till her moan rose to a peak".
We also raised a glass to the Publican & past GM STUBBY.
At the Robin Hood, SS had a drink & Carol as HYMIE's 
replacement ?? ( dunno - can't remember !!).
On to Irish Murphy's where we sang HALF A BAR's "seed being 
wildly spent", & SHAFTED's (wait for it & sing it thru'),
DA Da DA DUT DUT Da DA Da DA DAAR, & the Sweet Chariot 
Anthem, for our dear departed HEAVY.   On On.
BENT NOSE found a dummy for our very own "spitter" NORMAL,
& NORMAL wasn't even in a red T shirt !!
To the On After, Top Eureka and we sang again for MRS D, for 
"clenching thighs on fingers curled up tight", & for the Balding
BAD HEAD JOB, "his red locks growing sparse, was born on
Guy Hawkes Day".
And so, "it's goodnight from him", & Merry Christmas (Nooo -
NOT f**kin' Holiday !!) & Happy 2017 to all.
On On.

Monday, December 12, 2016

12 - 12 -'16     Run 1800     343 Miller's Rd.

TEFLON's run. MRS DICKHEAD was stand-in Choirmaster & called
the order, then NUM NUM took the floor in the official Grand Master's
coat to celebrate the Ballarat H3 1800th.
9 Super Athletes took to the run, soon to be caught up to by ROWDY,
after he had discovered the Drink Stop. The run was "a little challenging",
presenting many hills for us old farts, but we still managed to have our
first stubby before the 5 walkers appeared at the Crowny DS. Thanks for 
the choice of a shorter walk for the Short Cutting B's TEFLON
THE BILL TEFLON had first drinks at the On After, since they sprinted 
to the line for a dead heat, after tackling the 'long run'.
Welcomes back to LOIS LANE & FANG.
The 'oldest Ballarat H3 T shirt' entrants lined up - SS, LOIS LANE
ROWDYDUMB & DUMBER, SPENCER HOCKING & BAD HEAD JOB.
SS screwed TEFLON for the weather & a great walk out in the bush
for the 5, but "don't know about the run".
         He said that GLIDER was well considering having treatment.
         GOGO's funeral was a fitting celebration of his life, many there 
         & his 3 Daughters spoke very well.
ROWDY proclaimed 1800 - the year of 'Aussie Glory', sending the
first Merino fleeces to England.
TEFLON had a pedantry charge for his 'errant apostrophies' in the
past week, & LOIS LANE brought along her 'historic survival kit
Hash bag', complete with condoms, tampons & a bottle opener.
FANG for looking good on his Vespa step thru', NUMMY for catching
the 18 foot-long snake - putting a box ( not hers!!) over it's head,
GILF for maybe being TEFLON's lucky night.
CRIS CROS wrapped ROWDY up in the tennis net, in case of a 
mossie strike, & MASTABAIT knew everyone in the area by name,
including the dog outside Ponga's gate.
LOIS LANE commiserated NZ Cricket's 3rd loss & the fact that
retiring PM Key doesn't want to know about it.
NUM had a drink for her 'oldest shirt', GILF for the Full Moon
charge, & PEBBLES for his 'biggus dickus'.
An ample supper by NUM & DUMB of Ham on the Bone, salads,
rolls, quiche & cake - very nice !!

Next week - Christmas Run from the Sheltered Workshop & 
On After at Top Eureka.

SS thought one of his most memorable nights at Hash was when
FOGGY wanted to take him to bed.
ARSO made a remark that he (ARSO) wouldn't be much good
in bed 'because you can't push a blancmange through a letterbox'.
JISM got his name for being caught out 'rooting' on the run.

Over & out !!

Monday, December 5, 2016

5 - 12 -'16   Run 1799   441 Doveton St. Nth.

SOS's Run. GM NUM welcomed the ancestors Sue & Simon.
Welcomes back to JITTERBUG - back to Hash after a sabbatical,
the visiting ZIG & SILIC from the touring love-fest honeymoon.
16 super athletes headed off past the rose garden (hey SOS
what's the ladder in the front bedroom for - been swingin' from
the chandelier??) & were caught up to, at the 1st halt by his
lateness SHAFFY. Crowny's flowed at the school Drink-stop,
then back for the On After.
NUMMY kicked off the charges with Sue & Simon (Mum & Dad),
Rhiannon (Partner), JITTERBUG, ZIG, SILIC & SOS.
Screw SS first brought the attention to the shape of SOS' mo,
being nicely tweaked at the edges. The walk was good, & the 
"bar was raised" with over 30 attending, but on the run, why
were so many halts & checks in the middle of a block? 
NORMAL took charge of the bbq utensils, & we all thought,
that with the rising flame we'd need the CFA, but the 
carcinogenic snags & steak arrived first. 
Sergeant ROWDY charged REAR ENTRY for being the would-be
Grogmaster, then a reverence charge in memory of 
GOGO (GOGGO !!) - but he did go & get baled up. SPENCER 
HOCKING for being a Senior Ambassador for the White Ribbon
Foundation, then PEBBLES for his obscene / revealing garb
at the White Ribbon breakfast. MASTABAIT for 'closest to
the pin' with a wrong answer to "1799 - Bass & Flinders
circum-navigated Van Dieman's Land.
NUM NUM received a lovely Christmas Card from Gold Bus, 
& JITTERBUG's green 'map of Tassie' should have been a bit 
lower, to be closer to the real thing. SHAFTED had a drink for 
another winning horse, but according to DR DEATH, the horse 
started at $11.50, & SHAFFY had only backed it at $8.00. 
CHRIS CROS had the appropriate attire, seeing as ZIG was here - 
the old orange ZIG T shirt from years ago. PUSBUCKET had a 
SILIC shirt on, even though it had never seen a drop of sweat. 
PLUCKA had the perves goggle-eyed while we stopped at the 
railway gates. SOS took one for pooch 'Chicken', seeing as she'd 
been round all the bags sniffing at the contents.
Religious Adviser PUSBUCKET ascended the pulpit to recite 
the chant & initiate Rhiannon - arise "TIDY TWAT". She did take
a while to drink from the 'Initiate Cup' - a bit strange thought
SOS, seeing as how she is usually quick to swallow!!
Grog Master SPARTACUS found the pool an ideal spot to wash
the down-down cups, but the residual chlorine did turn
DUMBER's red wine 'white'.
Next Week's Run - Teflon's from somewhere in Invermay,
(map to be supplied). 





Wednesday, November 30, 2016

29 - 11 -'16      Run 1798     14 Platypus Dve.

CRIS CROS is the Hare. MOUNTIE blew the reverance horn & 
GM NUM began with welcomes back to CLEAV-er-AGE & FANG
& welcome to SON OF TEFLON, & HANNA.
Runners vacated via the 'rear entry', walkers out the front & 
1/2 doz. bar flys (incl. Self) stayed on to cart the drink stop,
which was in place shortly before the walkers, & soon after
came runners. CLEAVAGE was waiting for coffee !! ROWDY was
quick to leave the group conversation, when 3 old farts were 
looking for some free consultations. 
On After & first drinks were for CLEAVAGE, FANG, SON OF TEF
& HANNA. With the lack of reverance, NUMMY had a large
meltdown & the limbo bar was well & truly 'raised' (or kicked
off the supports) & came crashing to the ground !!
Charges 'may include but not limited to' ..........
SS charged CRIS CROS for run & walk, & for most arriving 
together at the well catered for Drink Stop. 2 DICKS joined in 
the charge, then it was decided that all "Dicks" drink together - 
enter QUICK DICK & HALF A BAR.     
R.A. PUSBUCKET had a drink for bringing on the good weather 
& for his choice of mis-matched socks, ala DR DEATH.
On Saturday's 'Celebration Mystery Bus', MOUNTIE was slapped
then had a cry, DONUTS & SPENCER HOCKING didn't know 
where they were for tea, & REAR ENTRY deserted the ship at 
10:30 pm, blowing .269 into the bag. REARY had another drink
for his philosphy "a man can only drink so much beer ....!!"
FANG could only manage a walk tonight, as the old fart had
done 5 km earlier this morning. LOIS LANE charged ROWDY
for his 'nasty gash' on the forehead, & MOUNTIE found keys
in her 'nasty gash'.
GLIDER - get well soon after a stint of chemo. 
Next week's run - SOS, 441 Doveton St. Nth.



Monday, November 21, 2016

21-11-'16     Run 1797     Cnr Butt & Elsworth

1797 & ROWDY had 'Nuthin' - but Explorer/Geologist Strzlecki was
born on June 24 (you wanted that BENT).
GM NUM NUM called the troops to order & welcomed visitors 
HEAD HUNTER & QUICK DICK from Oslo, & welcomes back to
BAR LICKA, PLUCKA (back from O.S.), & FLUID MOVEMENT for 
a visit (in Canberra, at Hash they call her FLU MOO).
NORMAL said an 8km run, & we all thought the A***hole was joking,
so 14 Super Athletes took off into the bush. HEADHUNTER says an 
8km run is great. We eventually came across the Crowny drinkstop,
after some fairly serious 4 WD tracks en-route, then NUMMY
arrived with the Down Downs in the mini Mustang.
SS screwed MASTABAIT for the 10 out of 10 run, walk & drinkstop,
to a rousing chorus of "Fox on the Run". He also commented that
the visitors from "Ireland" (not quite Oslo 1300 kms away), were
easy on the eye, at least one of them.
Sergeant ROWDY charged NUMMY for her over zealous time
keeping, setting off too early, QUICK DICK for being a quick dick,
& MASTABAIT for the lengthy run making us all well & truly
f**ked (like MRS D on the recent honeymoon).
PLUCKA was presented with the birthday muffin for the 43rd,
& drank up for the analogy of "red cock at night, PLUCKA'S
delight".
DR DEATH had a drink for inviting PUSBUCKET & SPARTACUS
to the Cup, but not MOUNTIE, & SHAFTED for a 3rd placed horse.
MASTABAIT had a double charge for his bike ride (with the bike
on the train) & now about to buy the electric one, & PRINCESS
has the new mattress installed, but he's still not invited to bed.
The someone who fell off the back of the ute in Dolly's Hill Road
was 24, so forget worrying about it being HALF A BAR or
BAR LICKA - it's more than a little while since they were 24.
Congrats. to MRS DICKHEAD - new GM of the PMT Hash.
SHAFTED charged for the Steward's visit to swab the Trainer
& not the Horse & DUMB & DUMBER for great colour
co-ordination - matching shirt, socks & jocks.
HEAD HUNTER & QUICK DICK have come clean saying,
"We're not visiting, we're staying".
BENT NOSE charged BAD HEAD JOB (which should have been
a rebound) for being a tight arse & probably won't go to the
Top Eureka - it's the outrageously over the freakin' top
North Brittain - get it right !!
That's enough - Next Weeks' Run, Cris Cros, 14 Platypus Drive,
Mt Clear via rear entry & mind the plants.

Monday, November 14, 2016

14 - 11 -'16    Run 1796    State Forest Rd

According to much wikied ROWDY, 1796 was the year that Edward
Jenner administered the first smallpox vaccine.
We welcomed Ford Royalty in the carpark, with DUMB & DUMBER'S
new wow factor Mustang, with the mere 557 km on the clock, & very
nice it is. Chick (or old chook !!) Magnet ??
11 super athletes headed off into the bush, met along the way by his
"ever lateness" SHAFFEY. Same amount of walkers took to the track
& we met at the welcome drinkstop, 50 m  short of the On On, 
then back to hare DONUTS' place.
R.A. PUSBUCKET was absent, so must have placed a remote order
so as good weather & the Supermoon would coincide with the Circle
around the campfire.
Welcomes back to PAULINE, LOIS LANE & BAD HEAD JOB.
Stand-in screw SHAFTED gave DONUTS  the well earned longest 
screw he's ever had, for a good run, & overall great night.
Sergeant ROWDY'S first utterance was a Rememberance Day charge
for the sadly departed - most recently, CRUNT & BIG BALLS
but as well to ARSO, HEAVY, RUSSELL UP THE PUBLICAN &
MIDNIGHT.
PAULINE took one for the recent NZ Earthquake, DUMB & DUMBER
for Leonard Cohen's passing, CHRIS CROSS for Australia's 
appalling Cricket debacle, & DR DEATH for the Edward Jenner
Smallpox shots.
SPENCER HOCKING had a drink for knowing the term "syzygy"-
straight line-up of Sun, Moon & Earth, & BAD HEAD JOB for 
"perigee" - Moon's closest approach to Earth.
GILF had to drink up for bitching about hare DONUTS parking
too close to the puddles at the drinkstop.
Talking of parking - BENT NOSE backed all the way down the
50 M driveway, when he could have driven the circle round the 
house - Engineer ?? ROWDY was one of the last charges for 
organizing sponsors to the Gold Rush Nash Hash in Feb '17.
That's it - was too dark for any more shorthand !!
Thanks to MRS D for fixing the BHD f/up on the Blog.

Next weeks' run - NORMAL & MASTABATE from Cnr. Butt
& Elsworth Sts, Canadian, & On After - Top Eureka.

Monday, October 17, 2016

17 - 10 -'16      Run 1792     Steffen Close

The PUSBUCKET run in the fabulous East, & NUMMY continues
to 'raise the bar' by showing up. Welcome to A(20) & PLUGGA,
& welcome back to SPENCER HOCKING.
DR ROWDY's offering for 1792 was "The 1st public guillotining
in France, & Denmark's abolishing the Slave Trade" - thanks Wiki.
15 'athletes' headed out past the York St frogs, & I guess, so did 
the walkers - into the bush for yet another shicky run. After his
welcome back from Vietnam, SPENCE decided not to run - 
probably no kids in & around Pax Hill. Ohhhhh, the look on 
ROWDY's face to think he'd be cumming down Cathie St !!
Drink-stop in the shed at MOUNTIE's niece's, then thru' the 
back gate (REAR ENTRY was ecstatic), to the On After.
SS screwed PUSBUCKET ( Hare & Religious Adviser) for
organising good weather, the run (tho' SS had no idea) & the 
well organised walk amongst the flora.
Charges "may include, but not limited to .........." Well done
PEBBLES for a full marathon on Sunday, & ROWDY for the half.
For body parts missing or removed, GLIDER, BP, PEBBLES &
SILIC.       PLUGGA & A(20) for the venue.  
DR DEATH for waking up very seedy after last week's Market
Pub run, & now 'raising the bar' drinking red wine (wain) 
as a charge. DUMB & DUMBER for another unsuccessful run
by Throstle - methinks the only way to make a $ from said 
Throstle is to follow it round with a shovel & bucket !! 
HALF A BAR for no f**kin' idea about any f**kin' Nobel f**kin' 
Prize, & who the f**k is Bob f**kin' Zimmerman anyway?
Fashionistas CHRIS CROSS & NORMAL - what lovely coats
for Hash. The Bulldogs win got SILIC yet another drink, & the 
AFL Trade week one for REAR ENTRY, PLUGGA & SILIC.
ROWDY got some lovely purple flowers from SILIC - where
have your hands been this time ROWDY ?
Something about SHAFTED's C**t (CAT) Hat, & PLUGGA
took one for the absent PLUCKA's 110 th run. 
MOUNTIE got SHAFTED to bring the Hash Trailer, & back
it up the driveway, all the while cooking the viddles in 
the kitchen. A few burning rings of fire this morning I'm sure.
MRS DICKHEAD wanted to thank the dirty little scumbags
that broke into her house, & hoped the little f**ktards
rot in hell !! PUSBUCKET delivered the "HALF A BAR's a
Country Member" gag, & REAR ENTRY came in the back gate.
SHAFTED saved the investors from some insider trading,
& as usual, NORMAL had to stand in to drink for the
DAZED & CONFUSED charge.

Blog Bastard over & out for 3 weeks - I'll take a welcome 
back drink NUMMY, but don't pour it just yet - C U Nov 14. 

Next week's run - SS from the Fish Hatchery, Gillies St.


Monday, October 10, 2016

10 - 10 -'16      Run 1791     Market Pub

MRS DICKHEAD'S run in the wind & rain. Sniffyc*nts of 1791 by 
our Wikied-up DR ROWDY, is the birth year of 
Sir George Gipps of Gipps(land) namesake.
GM NUM "raised the bar" again by actually turning up.
Welcome back to LOIS LANE & PAULINE, & welcome to the 
visiting SLAB, GOANNA & SCRUBBA.
Can't comment 'bout the run, as the Blog Bastard joined the
bar flys at the opposition Pub, not even making it for a Light
Beer drinkstop at MRS D's. 
SS had some dreams (wet or nightmare ??) but screwed
MRS DICKHEAD for a good run anyway. 
NORMAL had a drink for something about Trump & the debate,
HALF A BAR was called Wylie Coyote for not sharing his
"horse's mouth sure-fire" bets with everyone and GOANNA 
& SCRUBBA for texting DUMBER about the Hash Run.
MOUNTIE was mortified that the Queen's oldest Corgi had died.

That's all folks !!

Next week's run - PUSBUCKET from Steffen Close (off York St).

Monday, October 3, 2016

3 - 10 - '16  Run 1790  Daylight Saving Run

DR ROWDY'S "shicky run" thru' the sodden bush around 5 Ways.
GM NUM'S  absence (due to man flu?) continued to "lower the bar"
& stand-in DUMB & DUMBER was in charge. ROWDY'S utterings
re: 1790 were Mozart's composition of "Cosi Fan Tutti" (English
translation "Women are like that") & the patenting of Shoelaces.
Athletes headed off into the mud (wasn't ROWDY'S Midland Golf
run in the mud?) & were eventually fooled into a false trail by 
D&C & the 'recently returned to running' BENTNOSE. 
3 barflys actually made it this week to the drinkstop Fat Yak et al.
Charges (may include, but not limited to), SILIC & PUSBUCKET
for their teams' win/loss in the Grand Final.
SS screwed ROWDY for his leaving the good weather behind
in South America, the run, the walk, the drinkstop & the well lit
Circle - great lights DUMBER.
DUMBER for his loser horse that got a crook ticker after a dose
of cobalt, & then the Bookmaker giving him a 10:1 bonus for his
honesty over a betting slip debacle. PEBBLES for being 
surprised that his runners weren't waterproof. PUSBUCKET for
for the 20 to 8 free kick imbalance in the Grand Final.
REAR ENTRY - Richmond now holds the record for the longest
wait for a Premiership win. D&C - most un-Australian going to a 
Stage Play on G.F. Day. MASTABAIT on his way to France (didn't
he just get back?) - what does NORMAL do now?
BP for a brand new Grand Niece. MRS DICKHEAD - something 
about buying new runners for PRECIOUS (Blog Bastard can't 
read his shorthand !!).
Birthday boys ROWDY & DUMBER.

Next week's run MRS DICKHEAD from the Market Pub.

Monday, September 26, 2016

26 - 9 -'16   Run 1789   Carboni's on Eureka

D & C's (supposed 8 km) run. DR ROWDY returned to give us the
sniffyc*nts of 1789 - the Fletcher Christian "Mutiny on the Bounty"
Welcome to Big Sky (son of TEFLON) - welcome back to PRECIOUS.
The "athletes" headed off in raincoats, hats & gloves, for a jog in 
the incessant rain, & finished at the drink-stop outside of the Pub.
7 Bar Flys braved the bar for the duration, (watching the Wags'
Brownlow display 'in & out' of their creations), & not even making
it outside for the drinks. Amongst the charges inside, were SS
for a red letter day & thinking "it wasn't really raining tonight".
PUSBUCKET & SILIC for their working class, & REAR ENTRY for
Richmond's so long out of the running for a Grand Final spot.
DUMBER & DUMBER spent half his weekend watching the muscle
girls, & CHRIS CROSS caught half naked in the women's toilet - 
we assume he was only changing !! PUSBUCKET & SPARTACUS
were afforded a drink on account of the fire at their "office",
JD's Bar. SILIC, resplendent in Doggie's hat & guernsey wasn't
giving up hope of Grand Final tickets. Son of TEFLON for his
Manbun.
That's enough !!
Next week's run - ROWDY. On on at 5 Ways - On after Top Eureka.

Tuesday, September 20, 2016

19 - 9 -'16     Run 1788    Athletic Club

1788  The Invasion ??? Of Course !! SPENCER HOCKING'S run.

GM NUM called the order, with a Happy Birthday to GILF, & welcomes
back to BUBBA, CHRIS CROSS, CANDIDA, ROAD RUNNER & GILF.
About a doz. 'athletes' headed off on the easterly run, & as usual,
a couple of bar flies couldn't even make it to the drink-stop, 300
yards away. SPENCE'S idea of encountering 'old trail', turned out 
to be trail from the PMT Hash the day before.
Stand in Screw MRS DICKHEAD eluded to us visiting many of
SPENCER'S favourite fantasy spots - the old Humffray St
State School, Ballarat Girls' School, the back of St Alipius (but we
were out of coloured ribbons), the School of Mines with a lingering
trip round the Child Minding Centre, & finally a Halt outside Crocker's
for a cunning look at some kiddy uniforms. 
Football charges - SILIC for The Doggies not being able to hang-in
for the Prelim & ROADRUNNER for the Hawk's embarrasing loss.
New Hash gear is obviously neat casual according to CANDIDA,
ROADRUNNER & BOOTROOTA, but SILIC still fronts up in his
un-sartorial excellence. REAR ENTRY still reckons STUBBIE'S 
beer is like cat's piss. HALF A BAR wouldn't f**kin', f**kin well
pick-up f**kin' DR f**kin' DEATH - nooo f**k him !! 
According to PUSBUCKET, BUBBA was doing the work of all 3 
of The Stooges, Larry Curly & Mo, & NORMAL caned,
PUSBUCKET  for no charges from the walk.
MOUNTIE won't jog in pantyhose - says "it sets them on fire" - 
must be fairly hot "down there" - you makin' the most of that Snag?
BHD charged for a photo that "resembles someone" on the 
Member's Blog, but it matters not - no-one ever looks at either
Blog anyway.
Some charges out of the window here as the Blog Bastard 
can't read his short-hand the next day !!
Next week's run - seems to be Pebbles (from somewhere),
hold that thought - it's now D & C from Carboni's on Eureka.

Monday, September 12, 2016

12 - 9 -'16    Run 1787    Miner's Tavern

SPARTACUS' run, & still no DR ROWDY to give us the 
sniffyc*nts of 1787. Well, of course, Capt. Bligh set sail 
from England on the Bounty.

GM NUM here (at last) to call the troops to order.
Welcome from Lakeside (spruiking their crap !!), to 
CHEESCAKE and EGGS & BACON. Welcomes back 
to PIMP & FASCINATOR, but don't encourage him !!
A run around the North in steady rain, to finish at the 
Sheltered Workshop, & much drying of gear by 
DUMBER'S bar heaters, all the while, looking over the 
abundance of yellow XD heaps of shit.
PUSBUCKET was stand-in Sergeant & nominated 
PLUCKA as Religious Adviser - she said "Might as well, 
good weather for ducks". 
Not running in the East was in contempt of the Gods 
according to PUSBUCKET no wonder we had shit 
weather. 
He pointed out the 'all male' painting on the wall, 
& it's depiction of a bygone Golden Era - 
No women at Hash!
SS screwed SPARTACUS for a good run & shame about
the religious adviser's choice of weather. An extremely 
well stocked drink stop at DUMBER'S & now that 
SPARTACUS is back behind the wheel (albeit unlicensed), 
he should be able to pick up BHD.
MOUNTIE lost her horn, & was probably the only horn 
she was gonna to get for the night. D & C got charged 
for "The hairs on her dicky-di-do" & & & &, I got so 
excited, I can't remember the rest !!
No need for Lakeside's sex deviant 2 DADS - we've
got our own - THE BILL
Hanging onto her tits caused EGGS & BACON to stack 
her bike.
NUMMIE'S certainly "raising the bar" - HALF-A-BAR 
is not coming at all.
Next week's run - SPENCER HOCKING at the 
Athletic Club (if it's open) - You'd think he would know.


Tuesday, September 6, 2016

5 - 9 -'16    Run 1786    The Grapes Pub

THE BILL'S run, & with DR ROWDY holidaying somewhere in South America, no significance of 1786 mentioned, except, (as everyone knows !!), that it's the year the Transport Ship of the First Fleet "Prince of Wales" was rebuilt, eventually sailing into Botany Bay in 1788.  THERE !!
Yet again, stand-in GM DUMBER called order - 8 "athletes", 'bout 12 walkers & 3 or 4 bar flys present. 
Welcome back to Intrepid Cape York Biker DOUGHNUTS.
SS figured it a nightmare to screw THE BILL, but at the end of the "Alley Run", the well stocked drink-stop saw the "athletes" arrive before the walkers. 
Well done THE BILL. How many travellers does NORMAL actually have ?
GM NUMMY came late - is that usual DUMBER ??
Stand-in Sergeant BENT NOSE held court with the Charges.
MRS DICKHEAD 500 Runs, DR DEATH for his sartorial excellence, BOOTROOTER pre-hash training walk, GLIDER for his "Mother Theresa - like" healing handshake, CHRIS CROSS for up market dining with school kids having snails, MRS DICKHEAD for hoping, but not being raped in the mall, & HALF-BAR the private school dropkick.  

That's enough !!


Next week's run, SPARTACUS (after much deliberation) at Miner's Tavern.

Wednesday, August 24, 2016



22 - 8 - '16      Run 1784     Midlands Golf Club

Significance of 1784 introduced by the very well Wiki-Googled 
SERGEANT ROWDY, the year Benjamin Franklin invented Bi-focal Spectacles.
Welcomes back to LOIS LANE after a 4 month break from hash crap, WYLIE son 
of SILIC back now that they are speaking again & bonding, & DUMB & DUMBER
standing in for GM NUM.
Runners soon got a taste of the swamp underfoot, on what turned out to be a 
good run, & to be screwed by SS as the run at Mudlands.
It was "HEAVY underfoot" as we paused for a Port & Swing Low at our Mate's
graveside. SHAFTED arrived by car as we were leaving, & too late to crack 
the 750 of Rum he'd left there earlier. Foster's night continued at the drink stop
with a welcome slab of blue amongst the green.
SILIC doesn't run (or walk) at Hash these days, but obviously can't even make 
the drink stop without falling arse over head into the mud, to which 
R.A. PUSBUCKET, was not having a bar of the kiss of life if needed. Back to the
On After & much drying of shoes & socks by the open fire. Dinner arrived early,
so down downs were downed on a reasonably full stomach. 
SHAFTED & DR DEATH eventually got their much postponed prospectus meeting
over with, bringing the lever arch out for all to see.
WYLIE made the illustrious ranks being initiated "PIMP",  brought about by his
association as purveyor of the horse flesh trade.

Next week's run, MOUNTIE'S Eureka Run from The Stockade MADE Museum,
& On After at Top Eureka.