Tuesday, December 25, 2018

23 - 12 - '18         Run 1911        Lakeview

So the 13 "Get a life" crew assembled with all the Alfresco 
Set on the banks, for a pre-run refreshment, to be joined 
impromptu by HAEMORROIDS, happening past in the cab.
MOUNTIE was the hare (in Santa sparkles) saying, there's the 
On On & there's a Drink-stop. Off went the 6 Super Athletes,
leaving the bar flys (FOP drinking his craft beer... life's too
short !!) to wander on to Devon St. At the Drink-stop, were the
waiting SPARTACUS & Tracey, already imbibing the 'real' beer
& tasty nibbles.
PEBBLES said his welcome to the run, saying that MOUNTIE 
had set it very well, & thanks for everything at the Drink-stop, 
then a welcome to Tracey.
They called on MOUNTIE to screw herself. She moaned on 
about her 'bad week', but agreed it was a good run & sharply 
marked, but did have the odd 'Left turn to the Right'.
PUSBUCKET was Stand-in Sergeant, & had memorised the
limerick " ....... was it class or just arse, the Hash Screw is 
saying the latter".
                        (Shitty trail ........ ).
He continued with his 'salutory tale' about Inflatable Boy 
taking out everything inflatable (including himself) - the 
school Principal saying "you've let yourself down". All 
teachers were then out for a drink together - SPARTACUS,
PUSBUCKET, CHRIS CROS, BITCHFACE, DIMWIT
BAD HEAD JOB.
The Sergeant kept BITCHFACE out, calling her an arsehole,
& saying "the best part of Susie ran down her Mother's leg".
NUMMY charged THE BILL for "looking hot", but translated
that to "sweaty". DIMWIT had to run along behind MOUNTIE
exposing her knickers all the way, & CHRIS CROS for 
exposing his "plums".
                     (Put it in your hand Mrs Murphy ......... ).
MOUNTIE charged BIG DOG for walking all the way from 
home just so as he didn't have to go on the walk. BIG DOG
had a 2nd, because PUSBUCKET had seen him "marking his
territory".
                      (U.G.L.Y. ...... you're ugly).
Tracey was called on to "adopt the position" to enjoy the 
sex & running ............ arise JUST CUM.
                      (Give us an A ........ ).
The Dirty Grandpa's were next to drink together - PEBBLES,
CHRIS CROS, DUMB(er) & DUMBER & BHD, joined by
MOUNTIE who fucked up the chant ....... tell us how it goes
NUMMY ........ (There's a game called 20 toes ..... ).
The Dad Jokes were there ...... Rudolph the Red Knows Rain
Dear, trumped by DIMWIT,  The Sheep's .... Merry Christmas 
to Ewe, & then his zinger ...... Torrential rain in Japan,
raining Datsun Cogs.        Boom boom.
FOP charged PUSBUCKET for the rolls of copper wire he 
had stacked up, then MOUNTIE included THE BILL as the 
ex copper.
SPARTACUS charged HER VAG for the Sharon Stone 'flash
your gash' award, & BITCHFACE had a drink 'cos she didn't
get any of it.
FOP had the last say ... "Christmas is like anal sex ... better
giving than receiving".

Next week's run - 1912 - At Cuthbert's, 103 'Their' Road.
Run & party (reprieve !! no dress ups required).

More scribing due Jan 21st.       Happy Nooo Yearrrrr !!

Tuesday, December 18, 2018

17 - 12 - '18    Run 1910    Miner's Tavern

The Santas & Elves gathered for the Christmas Run, bought 
grog & ordered Dinner. PEBBLES said his welcomes, 
reminding us of the songsheet "Hash Year of the CAR-ols"
He bought PUSBUCKET a drink for his sniffycunt birthday
ending in '0', & the 1st CAR-ol 'Silent Night' "SNAG has come 
& MOUNTIE might".
(Hashy Birthday fuck you .... ) & BITCHFACE was there too.
Down along Lydiard we went, thru' the Lane Cafe' & round to 
the 1st stop - Santa & the Reindeers opposite Top Eureka.
FANG had left the price tag on his Santa gear, hoping to 
return it next day - so too TRENCH, I think.
BHD was rudely shagged behind a bush by Santa, aka
'ratemyagent' FASCINATOR.
Page 2, No 2 Shafted the Hashman ...... sing it ..... da da da,
dut dut, da da da da daaah.
On Down to Skin Ski for some BOOTLACE cheer. MOUNTIE
& PLUCKA were 1st to drink, & then the 'Good King' CAR-ol,
"HALF A BAR was cruel, rammed it with his tool". PAULINE
followed with a solo version of his 'Wanna be a Ranger".
Next the 'Hark the Herald' CAR-ol for HALF A BAR, "Fark,
the herald angels sing ..... Christ that little prick's a pain".
HALF A BAR's 3rd,  'Deck the Halls', "Fuck the sheep, it
makes me jolly, all my girlfriends get called Dolly".
PRECIOUS had Girlfriend Peggy there, with a hole in her
stocking - of course, that's a stairway to heaven.
(Give us an A) to ROWDY, PRECIOUS & Peggy.
ROWDY (the randy Doctor) stayed out there - for Cathy it's
a little finger, for SILIC it's a clenched fist !! Of course, 
SILIC's 'only' exercise is 'didly squat', & with such a 
veranda on the toolshed, how did the deck below get wet?
If you crossed Santa (FASCINATOR) with PLUCKA, you'd 
have a Cwistmas Quacker. Out for a drink all of 'youse', 
to the CAR-ol "We 3 Kings of big bellies are, SILIC, PIMP &
MR FOSTER".
(Give us an A) for BOOTLACES' continued generosity on
the Christmas Run.
On on up the hill to Irish Murphy's - enter Leo, the Santa 
lookalike, minus the red suit & a Give us an A, then the 
'Joy to the World' CAR-ol for D&C, "let every single prick at 
Hash, know that our Max has pruned her patch".
NUTCRACKER's 'White Christmas' CAR-ol was up next,
"with every touch she will ignite, & may all her 
NUTCRACKing excite", followed by the girls in duo with
the 'God Rest Ye' CAR-ol "Maxi beds with NUTCRACKER,
& they have no need for lubricant - Oh slidings of comfort
& joy". 
PEBBLES had a welcome for Peggy, & welcome back for 
TRENCH. PLUCKA was there, just out of her sick bed,
suffering 'shagger's back', & BIG DOG was a late arrival.
The 'Rudolph' CAR-ol, "BIG DOG with your nose so bright,
I'll sit on your nose tonight".        (Give us an A).
SHAFTED reeled off the runs of sniffycunts - MRS D 565,
NUMMY 545, DONUTS 717, SILIC 909, BITCHFACE 40, 
MOUNTIE 1188, PRECIOUS 131, Peggy 1, & BHD 1020.
STUBBY said 'no way' & charged SHAFFY for the words 
in his 'Frosty the Snowman' CAR-ol, "he'd like to get his 
hands, then his lips on a Stubby".
FANG had NUTCRACKER, MOUNTIE & TRENCH out the 
front, saying that he could have 1 / 6 foot woman, or 2 / 3
foot women & screw them together.
PEBBLES had BIG DOG out, & as all 'bigs' drink together,
you too SILIC.
The SS 'Silver Bells' CAR-ol was next, "As Mothers rush 
home with wet knickers, Silver Balls, it's great when they 
bang on your clitty", but DUMBER had SILIC out, because
his one & only ball just clangs !!
Then, SILIC's 'Rudolph' CAR-ol "SILIC the (one time) rotund 
runner, had a very shiny head", & you too PIMP - all 
Dalziels drink together.
New shoes, or in LOIS LANE's case, drink out of the new 
hat, to the 'Away in a Manger' CAR-ol, "Her little tongue 
teases, then slurps up the spray".
On on to the Regent, & a 'Jingle Bell Rock' CAR-ol for 
PEBBLES, "It's a swell time, to go sliding on his one horse
sleigh", & then the 'Holly & the Ivy', "AMP billed dead men,
& PEBBLES took his commission, as he billed 'em by the
hour".
PEBBLES then charged SHAFFY for the toothbrush he'd
picked up on the road.
The DONUTS 'Oh Come all Ye' CAR-ol,  "Oh, come on me 
DONUTS, oh, come ye on my face again".
PEBBLES gave NUTCRACKER a drink for enjoying the 
CAR-ols so much, & ROWDY to BEERFUCK for his gold 
lame' suit - & gold everywhere.
THE BILL was up next, (seeing as they had to keep him 
away from Peggy), with the 'Oh Christmas Tree' CAR-ol,
"Oh BILLY GOAT, how shapely is your baton?", then Peggy
& EXIT (Sue) out together - 'Oh, Peggy Sue".
Last CAR-ol at the Regent, for Karol, the 'Oh Holy Night',
"Oh PLUCKA Duck, the sweet spot found, a new & glorious
dawn".
On on to the Miner's, & a 'Little Dumber Boy' CAR-ol, "I have
a small soft tool, I'm DUMB(er) & DUMB", followed by the 
'12 Days' CAR-ol, 5 floppy FOPs, 4 fine FANGs
3 PLUCK(A)ed ducks, 2 BIG DOGs, & a BITCHFACE to drink
with MOUNTIE.
The 'War is Over' CAR-ol for CHRIS CROS, "He once was the 
GM, that year's gladly gone".
Next, the HEAVY Hymn 'Swing Low', & PIMP had a drink, as
he had no idea of the movements.
TEFLON, the 'Oh Christmas Tree' CAR-ol - "Oh, Granny that
I'd like to fuck, that perfect shape of arse sublime ...", & out
you come, all you Granny Fuckers.

That's it - can't decipher the hand writing anymore!!

Next week's run - 1911 - Christmas Eve Committee Run
from Lakeview Pub.




Tuesday, December 11, 2018

10 - 12 - '18     Run 1909     Buninyong

PENNY FARTHING's run from home, at "313" as we all 
eventually found out. Run setter was cyclist SPENCER 
HOCKINGalthough he used QUICKDICK's template for more 
than half of it, and didn't even go anti-clockwise. 
PEBBLES began with a welcome to "it looks like a visitor",
WETCHECK & then SPIDER. MOUNTIE had just realised the 
SPIDER return, & that began the kissy/hump outburst.
SPENCE told us "it's the usual - marked left & right, with 
some ups & downs & there's a Drink-stop". PENNY 
FARTHING reminded us of the Buninyong thugs, so all the 
valuables were locked away. WETCHECK wasn't seen again, 
so probably reverts to RESIGNATION.
The Drink-stop was very welcome, since SPENCE had added
to the QUICKDICK route, taking us over the Highway & via the
Gardens, eventually back to the Union Jack Creek.
Back at the Circle, PEBBLES welcomed back SPIDER, & then
after NUTCRACKER & D&C's badgering, SPIDER exposed the 
nipple rings.
Best Screw MOUNTIE was next, & calling up 
PENNY FARTHING, said she'd always been attracted to the 
older woman. She enjoyed the run, & even better as 
HEAD HUNTER was away & she didn't have to listen to her
bullshit & stupid BITCHFACE didn't see one mark. The Drive
mags were presented & the position on the board - 
Commodore. SHAFFY thought that was appropriate, as 
PENNY wasn't far off needing a commode. The limerick - 
"It's hard to recall, if she did bugger all, 'cos for 10 years
we haven't fuckin' seen her".
                          (Shitty trail ........ ).
Then there was a welcome back to BP, BIG DOG & PRECIOUS.
MOUNTIE had a pre Birthday drink for Tuesday's 61st (will you
still root me, or just shoot me, when I'm 61?).
MRS DICKHEAD with her sore back - ROWDY said "she's firing
(when) on all 4's".
                           (You're stupid ........ ).
DUMB(ER) & DUMBER was charged for Rachel's missing 
(stolen) car, & then D&C with her car woes, having to walk to
work etc., problem turned out to be a stone in the wheel-cap.
D&C charged NUTCRACKER for the 'freeby' at the barrister's,
being paid for with a head job.
                   (There's a game called 20 toes .......... ).
DUMBER charged PEBBLES for not being at the Friday BBQ -
he had a free AMP lunch in Melbourne paid for by some dead
people.
HALF A BAR had a drink for all the arrangement hassles on 
the 'horse day', & then it was cancelled.
                    (They're the meanest ............... ).
QUICKDICK had a drink for telling MOUNTIE on the run, 
summet about a quickie, & she asked "but hasn't 
HEAD HUNTER gone away?" That's when D&C offered to 
drive QUICKDICK home.
                    (Give us an A .......... ).
MOUNTIE charged MASTABAIT, asking him if WETCHECK 
had resigned for the 2nd time, & then HALF A BAR had the 
"fat arsed Santa from years ago" charge.
                  (Put it in your hand Mrs Murphy .......... ).
SHAFTED charged BENTNOSE for his new shoes, but BENT 
claimed that it was only clean freak BP at work.
DUMBER charged BENT for the MAMIL article on the ABC -
no Ferrari's, only push-bikes, & then PUSBUCKET was out for 
2 drinks - the pre 60 & couldn't be moulded by MOUNTIE.
                   (Asshole ..... to piss ..... for Cunt ....... ).
SHAFTED charged SS - "when did June have a run?" - D&D
hasn't run since mid June.
Last charge - FANG had D&D out for saying years ago to a 
new girlfriend & after perusing a wine list, "I think we'll have 
2 glasses of corkage - $5".
Great food for all on the PENNY FARTHING table - abundant
amount of bread rolls, leg ham, tomato, onion, beetroot, 
cheese & a Titanic size bowl of lettuce - thanks Pat.

Next week's run - 1910 - Christmas run from Miner's Tavern.
Bring extra cash.


Tuesday, December 4, 2018

3 - 12 - '18     Run 1908    Brown Hill Pub

SQUIZZY's return for a run from 'The Brown' (& another 
chance for SHAFFY to rush in as we leave). 
SQUIZZY told us that it took him 3 hrs to walk it, it's marked
in chalk & daubs of flour, walkers see NORMAL, the On On's
out the front & go North, to which we went directly South.
It wasn't long before we were up & down the goat tracks by
the Freeway, & then into the bush. The icy-pole stop saw 
walkers & runners re-group, before taking the track by the 
creek & back to the mid beer Drink-stop (that wasn't stolen!).
Back at the Circle, PEBBLES welcomed visitors 
DOWN UNDERWEAR & JUST FUCKING LOST
(HH & QD's mates).
                     (This is your down down song .... ).
Next, a welcome back for STUBBY.
                     (U.G.L.Y.   .......... you'r ugly).
PEBBLES had a charge for Hare SQUIZZY, for sending a 
photo of himself on a tractor, in the 'Year of the Car', & then
saying that tonight would involve a Christmas Toast, but 
didn't say whether it would be raisin bread or not.
                      (No no, bad ........ ).
Best Screw MOUNTIE welcomed the visitors as well, & then
produced the "Hope you come back" card from Gold Bus.
The Drive mags were next & then 'summet' about D&C trying 
to break into a car. She reckoned the icy-poles were crap, but 
the one little highlight was alcohol on the run, but it was 
light beer, so not a good position on the board. The limerick,
"His previous run would've been fun, but someone pinched
the Drink-stop".
                         (Shitty trail ....... ).
Sergeant SHAFTED looked around "Where are you SQUIZZY -
I can't see you - a great job even though MOUNTIE didn't 
like it".
LOIS LANE had a drink for saying that SHAFTED had never 
been to PMT, but SHAFFY said that there was no invitation.
TEFLON charged PEBBLES for driving a Peugeot to the 
'70 Years of Holden' display, then SQUIZZY for the 4 tarts 
asking "how long is it?"
                    (Put it in your hand Mrs Murphy ....... ).
MOUNTIE charged BITCHFACE for her photo with the 
spray can, & then PIMP was out for the sight gag of the
look alike green man photo.
HALF A BAR charged SILIC for waiting till the bar closed
at NUMMY's party, before he walked up to have his shout.
                    (A soldier ....., to piss ....., for cunt ......).
MRS DICKHEAD charged LOIS LANE for the look alike
wedding picture on the back of the green man page, then
CHRIS CROS to MOUNTIE for noticing the "Winding back
speedo" Car Dealer on the run (in the 'year of the car').
ROWDY gave SS a drink for pointing out that the VB 
Brewery started in 1854, the same year as Eureka & the 
Southern Cross Flag - Dec 3rd, & as all Brits drink together,
you too HEAD HUNTER & JUST FUCKING LOST.
                    (These feet, these hands ........ ).
PIMP & FASCINATOR had been discussing about a block
of land to agist horses, but now PIMP is gonna' agist 
virtual horses.
                    (You're stupid ......... ).
QUICKDICK charged CHRIS CROS & JUST FUCKING LOST,
saying that there was some kind of 'Geriatric Hipster
Movement' in place, & BITCHFACE couldn't tell them apart.
                     (They're the meanest .............. ).
PUSBUCKET trotted out the gag to ROWDY about the
'Digital Rectal' producing an erection, & as all Dr's drink ....
you too QUICKDICK.
                      (Give us an A ............. ).
Last charge - for HEAD HUNTER going OS.
                       (Fuck off ya cunt ............ ).

Next week's run - 1909 - Hare PENNY FARTHING from home,
                                          ?? Eyre St., Buninyong.
   

Tuesday, November 27, 2018

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Tuesday, November 20, 2018

19 - 11 - '18      Run 1906      Smythes Crk

The annual visit to State Forest Rd - DONUTS the Hare 
with the Hash 30+. The Scribe was on the overdue SILIC bus
& missed all the prelims. GLIDER was the lonely bar fly pacing
up & down, waiting to ferry the Drinkstop down the hill. The 
bar flys soon swelled to 8, with the arrival of 'ratemyagent'
FASCINATOR, then DR DEATH & HALF A BAR in the 
Prospector van, & SHAFTED well after 7:00, in the ute, after
delivering the horse shit. 
A very sweaty BILLYGOAT lead the field in to the Drinkstop,
100M down the hill from the On On.
Back to the DONUTS Res for the Circle & Fire-pit.
PEBBLES had welcomes back for NORMAL, PIMP & TEFLON.
                    (This is your Down Down song .......... ).
Best Hash Screw MOUNTIE 1st up charged PEBBLES for not
welcoming back GEORGE-PELLiCAN.
                     (Finnish Drinking Song ........ NO!).
She presented DONUTS with his Drive mags (one said 
7 salads), saying the run was beautifully marked & she'd learnt 
on the run, what HC meant - Hard Core, (but SILIC thought 
Hairy Cunt & DUMBER said Headen Cuthbert). She said that 
D&C has 'anti-sexidents' all the time, & then the limerick,
"the Hash Tarts all said he's a ripper in bed", but she had to 
mark him down - too many salads.
                      (Shitty Trail ........... ).
SHAFTED had DR DEATH out for no Hash gear, & as all Dr's
drink, you too QUICKDICK (was ROWDY hiding?), & then 
PIMP, FASCINATOR & HALF A BAR as the ignorant pricks.
PEBBLES (missing a vagina) didn't attend the PMT  AGM -
'no gash - no Hash', then BP was out as a Hash slut (?), & as 
all cunts drink ... you too NORMAL, & short cunt HALF A BAR.
                       (No, no, bad ........... ).
FASCINATOR charged DR DEATH for the Prospector truck 
being licensed for 15, but having 69 many times, then 
LOIS LANE had GLIDER out with his raw looking eye - "a root
is better that a poke in the eye".
NUTCRACKER & D&C had a drink for "You don't win friends
with salads".
                    (There's a game called 20 toes ........ ).
LOIS had an 'oopsy' with her 'best girl crack-shitter', & BP 
for saying that "MOUNTIE came out on the way out".
                              (They're alright .......... ).
SILIC charged NUTCRACKER for saying that DR DEATH 
needs a good horn in his truck, & PIMP saying about 'no book',
but he'd signed the Roy Higgins book. 
DUMBER had DR DEATH out the front as 'GM' of the Redan FC,
HEAD HUNTER as the new GM of PMT, & PEBBLES - our 
current GM. 
                       (They're the meanest ........... ).
MRS DICKHEAD called out PAULINE for his new shoes, & then 
the brand new haircut came to light. The brand new hat had a 
drink as well, whilst the bride LOIS helped him with the shoe.
                  (Put it in your hand Mrs. Murphy .......... ).
Last charge - NUMMY had a Hashy Birthday fuck you!
NORMAL couldn't contain himself being back on the BBQ 
tools, & we had 'too many salads' - DONUTS built 2 of them.

Next week's run - 1907 - Hare BAR LICKER from Meredith Pub.

Tuesday, November 13, 2018

12 - 11 - '18.      Run 1905      Creswick.

The BENTNOSE run from 84 on Albert Pizza. The Hash 35 
rolled up, & as GM PEBBLES put it, "We've started late 
enough for everyone to get here - even SHAFTED made the 
start". BENT told us how fantastic the run was (who knew!),
with as many hills as downhills. BP would be commandant 
of the walkers, & there's a pub in both directions for the 
bar flys.
We headed off around the streets of the west, with NUMMY
ROWDY & SHAFTED the early short cutting 'C's', but all to
no avail - completely in the wrong direction. After the hills 
& goat tracks of the bush, then came St. George's Lake, & 
back to the well stocked Carlton & Tiger Drink-stop,  in town. 
It stayed even well "stockter", with the absence of the bar flys.
The Circle was out back of 84, by the mini golf.
PEBBLES began with welcomes back for SPARTACUS,
ROWDY, SPENCER HOCKING, PRECIOUS & BHD.
DUMBER was 1st charge for his "dyslexic" boy grog post.
MOUNTIE was next for the 'screwing' - there were nice long 
tracks thru' the bush, & how she had to crawl up 
NUTCRACKER's arse on the hills. The Drive Mags were 
there, with headlines, "King of the Hill" & "Crowning Glory".
The limerick asked, " is he a bit of a flog?"
                            (Shitty Trail ....... ).
HALF A BAR got 'lashings' as the result of his sight gag 
(from the black & white printer).
SHAFTED called out the sniffycunt runs - PAULINE 222, 
BP 1133, BENTNOSE 1313, HALF A BAR 1188, 
THE BILL 1616, D & C 124, GLIDER 744 (he's still here!!), 
& PRECIOUS (?).
                             (Get a root, root, root .... ).
Sir Thomas BENT's name was next - Politician who was one 
of the most colourful & corrupt in Victorian history.
ROWDY "pulled one" in Paris & Portugal, then CHRIS CROS
charged BIG DOG for his Grinder Date at the Pub.
PRECIOUS charged the Non Hash Gearers - BITCHFACE,
NUTCRACKER & BIG DOG.
                              (No, no, bad, bad ......... ).
SS was out for blowing the froth from a beer (as he does),
& BAD HEAD JOB for the 'blatant self promotion' of the 
11-11-11 horn job (well no-one else would!!). 
REAR ENTRY charged THE BILL for running a red light,
& then letting himself off.
                            (Finnish drinking song ... NO!).
PRECIOUS had a drink for jumping on the water bottle in
front of D & C at the Drink-stop, then HER VAG was there 
for going to Bangkok, to Bang a Cock - are ya there FOP??
PAULINE charged HALF A BAR for his 8 years in the CMF.
Turns out that he joined the Airborne & after 100 parachute 
jumps (& not knowing how to land properly), he shortened 
his legs, to be the 'shortman' that he is today.
    PAULINE led the ...... (I want to be an airborne ranger...).  
Various flavoured pizzas & pasta followed, amongst the 
to & fro' bullshit of the bar flys.

Next Week's Run - 1906 - Hare DONUTS 
                                 State Forest Rd. BBQ.
                           
                            

Tuesday, October 30, 2018

29 - 10 - '18     Run 1903     Buninyong

QUICKDICK's 'Claytons Bush' & Town run from The Crown. 
We circled up for the reverence around the circled concrete
paving & had welcomes for visitors POLARIZED & HOOTU 
from Lismore Hash, NSW.  QUICKDICK demo'd his trail
heiroglyphics on the concrete, with a squirt of flour from
a drink bottle, while some of the gathered, thought that
Shane Mumford might have been lurking in the back with
a straw.
15 Super Athletes took off on the 5k run, initially thru' some
of the streets, soon to reach the goat tracks of the Bunny
bush. A couple of runners soon became walkers, & some 
thought that SHAFFY might have gone down a mineshaft, 
but realized he would've got stuck at the top !! 
Co-Hare HEADHUNTER was taking care that the (ahhem)
'slower' athletes were kept on trail, making some live trail 
(flour) marks from her 'drink' bottle. The well stocked 
Carlton Drink-stop was welcomed by the sweaty following.
The Circle was in the rotunda shelter, not 100m from the
Pub, but still too far for the 4 bar flys to join in.
PEBBLES called out SHAFTED for his 'official' 600th run, as
last week was just a piss-up, or in FOP's case, an arse up.
             (Get a life ....... )     ...... & then a welcome drink for 
                       POLARIZED & HOOTU.     
             ( There's a game called 20 toes ....... ).
The very best Hash Screw MOUNTIE was next & talked 
about the wonderfully marked & beautifully set run, where 
there was plenty of conversation about conversation, and
head jobs & wanking. POLARIZED gave everyone a good 
view of her arse as she fell over. The Drive mags had a 
headline for QUICKDICK that said 'Top Dog', & then the
limerick, "HEADHUNTER said less quick & more dick".
       (Shitty Trail ........ ) ..... & SHAFFY reckoned it should be
"less HUNTER & more HEAD".
PIMP was next for his sniffycunt 33rd run, & SILIC had a 
906, but was too busy at the bar. PIMP had a 2nd for being 
such a critic of his old man - SILIC.
               (No no, bad bad ............ ).
DUMBER was charged for saying that his polarized glasses
went dark "in the cold", & as it's all about being polarized,
you too POLARIZED. LOIS LANE called out QUICKDICK 
& (PLUCKA) for not explaining the "waving about of arms"
on the run, as PLUCKA was doing.
                (The wiggle of her arse ........... ).
BITCHFACE gave MOUNTIE a drink for falling over at 
Footscray Station on Saturday, then BITCHFACE took one
for falling over when she was pissed.
LOIS LANE had POLARIZED out for showing everyone her
'gash' after her fall.
                 (They're alright .......... ).
PIMP charged SHAFTED for his lack of birdology on the 
run - we did have the 'Ooh-Hoo' bird.
Last charge - DUMBER to BITCHFACE for being "asked to
leave" The George.
Obviously there's a sub-group in the making, with the 
bar flys not making it to the Drink-stop, the Circle, & then
having to 'dain' together at their own special table.

Next week's run - 1904 -  Old Colonist's Club for the 
Cup Calcutta - Fashions on the Field - Gash on the Grass.
$35 for meal & $15 for extras (shared amongst attendees).

Over & out - Stand-in Scribe should return for 1905. 





Tuesday, October 23, 2018

22 -10 - '18   Black Tie Night  Reptile Gulch

There they were, the 35+ in the 'Car Theme' attire, outside the 
Sheltered Workshop & drinking grog, waiting for the drop of the 
flag for the 3 bongo vans full of well stocked grog buckets & 
nibbles. PEBBLES, DUMBER & DUMBER & A40 were the 
designated decoys for the A, B & C teams, on the mystery trip
that began along Doveton, to a right turn at the Crematorium,
& along past 5 Ways. The real estate along part of Springs Road
was pointed out, but only 1 of the past residents was on board.
Next was a 'photo op stop' at Black Hill Look-out, taking in the 
sunset. We continued on to the next stop at SHAFTED's Office,
where the C Team bus overtook B Team, for our own Flasher
FOP to have his 1st chance to bare his arse.
On to the Down Downs at 'Errol's by the Arch', with more 
nibbles & little boys in bread rolls.
PEBBLES' 1st charge was for Black Tie Helpers NUTCRACKER,
NUMMY & Errol. Then he had TEFLON out for the 500 GM cars
on display at the weekend, & of course, all GM's must drink
together, so out some of them came. 2nd round of GM's was
for HALF A BAR, MASTABAIT, CHRIS CROS & SHAFTED.
SHAFTED had another drink - they couldn't work out whether
he was masquerading as a Greek Orthodox priest, or a seat
cover, going by the look of his head gear.
PEBBLES & Tiarni the Pole Vaulter were next - her cumming
as immoral support for the GM, but who provides the pole?
Errol had a drink for having the blue rinse in the WC, "because
the shit stinks !!"
MRS DICKHEAD charged PEBBLES for having Tiarni buy his
bow tie on the Web, then HALF A BAR charged FOP for getting 
his pants off while he was still sober - (little did we realize that 
there was much more to come !!).
                            (They're the meanest ....... ).
SHAFTED charged PYRO & BEERFUCK for some-et about 
holding hands on the bus, then PRAWN STAR & DOUBLE
ADAPTOR for their "why are we waiting?"
NUMMY was next for her headphones that resembled a pair
of truck tyres - she was "two tyred".
SNIFFYCUNT runs were for HEAD HUNTER's 69 (& who 
wouldn't ?), & SHAFFY's 600.
                             (Get a life ........... ).
PEBBLES called out A40 for his bus chauffeuring, & then we
were off. Back along Sturt St to the Sporting Globe, with FOP's
bare arse (& danglers) pressed up against the rear window
the whole time - all to DUMBER's dismay, driving the B Team
coach. 
FASCINATOR had been enjoying his own little 'solo black tie 
night', patiently waiting in the bar for the revellers to arrive.
The frivolity continued upstairs at The Globe, with more beer,
dinner & much 'darncing' to the great entertainment of
Mr Pobjoy - (he's got a Hash Name, I'm sure).

Next week's run - 1903 - The Crown, Buninyong.