Tuesday, June 26, 2018

25 - 6 - '18      Run 1885      Magpie St

BAD HAIR DAY's from BAD HAIR DAY's - somethin' about a
run with zeros (you didn't really expect a blog did you?!?).
We had a trot up, down & around the hills of Golden Point in
the fabulous East, eventually thru' some bush at Peady 
Reserve & back to the drink-stop that wasn't at Sovereign 
Hill Look-out - (the bar flys just loved that little bit of 
unexpected exercise !!).
At the circle, the usual charges followed, mostly for the 
Hairless Hare (but didn't include a drink from the 
"new shoes"). The limerick, Drive mag, Nash Hash tankard
& a superb T Shirt (thank you) completed the Screw from 
MOUNTIE.
Keeper of the Meat SHAFFY excelled with the snags, chops &
steak, ably dealt with by BBQ Chef NORMALPLUCKA was
completely forgotten about & had to 'beg' an egg or 2 from
the larder in the homestead. Mynie had chopped away for a 
couple of hours to produce some very tasty salads & slaw, 
& then there were "sweets for my sweet, & sugar for my 
honey". 
That's it - I've had a fair go - over & out till July 30th run.
Might get a chance to send a pic of a snow covered
trumpfart from the Allgau Alps or the Amsterdam clogs.

On on, Hairless Harry Blogger.

Monday, June 18, 2018

18 - 6 - '18     Run 1884       Cuthbert's Rd.

NUM "Cuthbert" from Cuthbert's with the Hash 24.
MOUNTIE called the reverence for the 'once again' Stand-in
GM TEFLON - think he's got the hang of it enough to do it 
full-time in '19. PEBBLES still out of it 'suffering' with his 
man flu. 
DUMBER said it was a 5k run, stay on the high ground to 
avoid the wet, there are a couple of on-backs & we'll go 
thru' a 'pergoda?'.
The Drink-stop was kept at the On On to make sure the 
Athletes were out of the cold, & out came the party pies &
sausage rolls.
ROWDY was Stand-in Choirmaster, & called the reverence
once they'd called off the search party for the absent 
BENTNOSE ('cos they couldn't be bothered !!).
It was the ideal spot for the Car Hash circle - surrounded by
the BIGM Blue yank tank, NUMMY's Fiat convertible under
the bag, & the backed-in Subaru - palindromic U R A Bus.
MOUNTIE began the Screwing, saying that NUMMY had 
short-cutted early - the run set on the bike by DUMB
Was noted that he went past Lazy Mo's & past the car
intersection of Windsor (the 302) & Cleveland (the 351).
She got rid of a couple of Drive mags, the limerick & gave 
it the '2nd to Top' award. 
                                  (Shitty trail ......... ).
Charges may include, but not limited to .... (missed a few !).
SILIC & Mini Me PIMP were out for the look-alikes, MOUNTIE
from Ayre's Rock & BENTNOSE for walking in late.
                                  (She's alright ..... ).
Sergeant SHAFTED was next & charged LOIS LANE for 
driving her car 'just round the corner' to Hash. GLIDER had
his long-winded spiel from the paper, about the Swedish IQ 
test saying that everyone's dumbing down, so if it happens 
here, will we all be called DUMB & DUMBER?
                          (What a wank wank wank ........ ).
NUMMY charged DUMBER for doing worse than her in their
IQ test, then SHAFFY's song, Do Wah Diddy Diddy DUMB 
Diddee Do !!
TEFLON took 2 drinks (GILF's & his own) for their 4th 
Wedding Anniversary & ROWDY charged BITCHFACE for 
when she fronted up to the wrong car.
                          (He's the meanest ........... ).
D&D presented SHAFFY with another new found glove to
complete the pair, & BITCHFACE had another drink, this 
time for being the 'rose between the thorns'.
                   (Put it in your hand Mrs Murphy ........ ).
Paul the Pom was out for a drink, & as all Paul's drink 
together ....... you too Paul Bearer. SPENCER HOCKING had
SILIC out the front, & PIMP (in the balaclava), ashamed to 
look like the old man.
                                  (U.G.L.Y.....).
MRS D charged BP & BENTNOSE.    BP didn't appear 
concerned enough that BENT was missing - said "He'll be 
OK". He didn't get raped in any of the parks. Was that why
he was so late - just hoping?
                    (There's a game they call 20 toes ..... ).
MOUNTIE charged BP for running round waving her arms 
in the air at some other stage, ROWDY charged MOUNTIE
- (dunno !!), & BENT to MRS D for her hair looking redder
by the day.
                              (Give us an A ........... ).
D&D had a charge for PLUCKA.    If most people smell the 
prawns, meat & veg cooking in the pan, does she walk
round smelling the grass & dog shit out of the mower?
8 beers left ..... you, you & you out for a drink.
NUM NUM had spent some hours 'stoving over a hot slave',
to produce some very enjoyable casseroles, spuds & pasta,
& dessert with ice cream.

Next week's run - 1885 - Bad 'Hare' Day's & BBQ from home.
58B Magpie St - enter thru' back gate on Madelia Court.
Don't forget grog - FOP's given up the sales.



Monday, June 11, 2018

11 - 6 - '18     Run 1883     Miner's Tavern

The "Stand-in" Committee Run for the Stand-ins, with Hare 
PRECIOUS. TEFLON stepped up to be Stand-in GM, & called
the reverence, saying "excuse me - listen in".
PRECIOUS told us to have a "bit of a run" then "go drink
some beer". 14 super athletes, 5 walkers. 1 bar fly ... & a 
partri......!! 
A couple of half circles of the CBD & then up thru' Soldier's 
Hill we went. You run from the Miner's, so where do you have 
the Drink-stop? Unlike last week, we made it back just before 
the rain.
At the circle, the 'real' Choirmaster QUICKDICK called the
reverence, & next, was Stand-in Screw SS. Didn't know about
the run, but reckoned it should get the Queen's Birthday 
Award - where's MOUNTIE?   BP led the walkers, going 
everywhere but nowhere, uphill & down, all the time talking
to herself, so he had huge sympathies for BENTNOSE. Next
was the limerick, & then 'they' used the "Camel is the horse 
designed by a committee" analogy for the run.
                                (Shitty trail ........ ).
Welcome's back for HEAD HUNTER, QUICKDICK
SPARTACUS, Paul the Pom & Paul Bearer.
TEFLON said about 'rumours' of sniffyc*nt runs tonight, so
it was PRECIOUS 70 & NUTCRACKER 44 out for a drink. Oh,
& another 2 'kind of sniffyc*nt runs' were THE BILL 1600 & 
BENTNOSE 1300 - (& he actually ran).
                                 (Get a life, life .... ).
Stand-in Sergeant BENTNOSE charged QUICKDICK & FOP
for declining the Sergeant opp - No means Yes - then, 
Immediate Past Choirmaster HEADHUNTER gave us the,
                                 (You're stupid ........ ).
SS had a drink to commiserate the Demons' loss - especially
as we didn't have to listen to ROWDY's chuckling, then D&C
& NUTCRACKER drank up as the 2 disabled blondes.
                             (No no, bad bad ..........). 
GLIDER had been gaining some culture listening to ABC
Classics, & heard the Adagio from SPARTACUS, & the 
Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairies from the NUTCRACKER 
Suite.
BENT & PRECIOUS had a drink for the rebound that wasn't -
work that one out !! PRECIOUS shouldn't have been drinking 
tonight, prior to his 2nd Uni exam, but he didn't sit for the 1st.
FOP charged 'the Son' PRECIOUS as being the 'classic 
millenial' - "Would you help me set the run, & bring some 
chalk, & buy the beer, & take me there?" - all the time saying 
that FOP had done f*ck all. 
            ....... here it is !!!      (Oughta be ........ ).
HEADHUNTER gave BENTNOSE the Fashion Police charge,
& Paul the Pom was caught 'stretching' on the run, & as one
Paul drinks ....... you too Paul Bearer.
                   (There's a game called 20 toes ........ ).  
BENTNOSE charged GILF & BP for adopting the 'position of
authority' on his podium, instead of staying on the floor with
the rest of the plebs, & THE BILL out for claiming 300 more 
runs than BENT - because he short-cuts all the time.
                      (Put your left leg over mine ..... ), 
                    complete with HEADHUNTER demo.
TEFLON charged QUICKDICK for adopting a position, making
it look like the torch was shining from his elbow.
                 (Bullshit, bullshit, it all sounds like bs .......).
BENTNOSE charged SPARTACUS for failing the only job he
was given - took half an hour to get the music turned off for
the circle, then MRS DICKHEAD spruiked the rebound to 
BENT, saying that half an hour was 'ultimate efficiency' when
he was a Govt. "Worker".
The jugs were empty as the phones ran hot in the 
Trailmaster's absence - "where's next week's run?"
Run 1884 - Hare NUM NUM from home, Cuthbert's Road.

Tuesday, June 5, 2018

4 - 6 - '18        Run 1882        Brewery Tap

BEERFUCK's night in the Far East. Stand in Choirmaster 
NUMMY called the reverEnce, & first up for GM PEBBLES 
was the welcomes back for JITTERBUG, LITTLE EVIL
NORMAL
BEERFUCK said the run was like his Nerrina run (whatever !),
& stay on trail if you want a drink - so the bar flys stayed at 
the pub. Out we went into the rain, & along each side of the
rectangle, thru' the long wet grass, & back via the Freeway
(not dangerous at all !!) to the Drinkstop by the servo. The 
super athletes made it before the walkers, the Hare having 
to cycle back to chase the keys from said walkers.
At the Circle PEBBLES had drinks for the "welcome's
backers", then called on the 'Best Screw in Hash' MOUNTIE.
She said that it was about as far East as you can get, we'd 
been thru' every mud puddle, gauze bush, long grass & hunk
of shit in the district, & the pink, yellow & white paint was no
challenge at all for Dr ROWDY. Then came the Drive mag, 
limerick & spot on the board. 
                                  (Shitty trail ........ ).
Sergeant SHAFFY had BEERFUCK stay out for having to run
along the Western Highway, just because he's a Weston, but 
it was bloody dangerous in the rain & blinded by the 
headlights, so out you come as well PEBBLES, 'cos the 'fish
always stinks from the head first'. 
Sniffyc*nt runs were for EXIT 69 & DIMWIT 44.
FASCINATOR relayed a charge from HER FANNY to 
MOUNTIE - HER FANNY didn't want to be known in public
as "that", ala (the late) Fran as CRUNT
NORMAL wanted to step up for a charge, but was smartly
dismissed by the Serg.
PEBBLES advertised the sniffyc*nt runs of next week - 
THE BILL 1600 & BENTNOSE 1300.
                    ( ....... & the boys go down down ..... ).
NORMAL charged PEBBLES for his idea for cars, "but it's not 
all about cars", MRS D to PUSBUCKET for his eye 'patch',
& DUMBER for DEEP HEAT's wall ruler to measure the 
height of NUMMY's tits in years to come.
                    (Do your tits hang low ........ ).
FASCINATOR's moving from Waubra to Errard St. & 
complaining already about the new carparking plan, 
NUTCRACKER's been setting roots on the run, & 
BITCHFACE had a drink for the p/incorrect name of 
Black(native)berries.
                     (Put it in your hand Mrs Murphy ...... ).
SHAFTED had NUTCRACKER out for a demo, saying "it's
stinkin', wet & hard to put your hand in" - ( the old glove
that he'd found on the run !!).
LOIS LANE called out BENTNOSE for the 'dementia' memory
loss & MOUNTIE to PUSBUCKET for his keys being in 
Geelong all the time, after he had taken the train from 
Geelong via Melbourne to Ballarat.
SHAFTED charged Christine Mary for her likeness to 
'Something About Mary', & PIMP for swanning round the
lounge in bare feet.
                      ( ..... down to his 2 skin ....... ).
NORMAL charged BENTNOSE for being over-ruled by 
BP's wanting to turn back on the walk, & PLUCKA for not
running him over at the round-about, being the only one at
Hash who wouldn't.
FASCINATOR had random charges (to empty a jug), PLUCKA,
LOIS LANE, D&C, SS, REAR ENTRY & HALF A BAR - that
Barnaby's had sex.
PUSBUCKET had ROWDY out for having the L & R signs on
his socks, then ROWDY to ClitterBUG for being totally 
covered (including the face scarf) at Ballarat Hash, but 
displaying 'the girls' in all of the recent photos.
                                 (You're stupid ..... ).
BENTNOSE charged MOUNTIE for saying "it was great", 
& BEERFUCK for having to chase the keys to the Drink-stop.
                      (Why were they born so beautiful ..... ).

Next week's run - 1883 - Hare PRECIOUS from Miner's Tavern.

Obvious that MASTABAIT's away - BENT's miraculously 
NORMAL's chauffeur again.