Monday, March 27, 2017

23 - 3 -'17             Run 1815         Slatey Creek

ROWDY's run for 'passed' Hash-man MIDNIGHT, signalling the end of
daylight saving. About 15 runners & 1/2 doz. walkers took to the tracks
around Slatey, whilst 7 of us were left to tend to the "homefires". They
returned to On Home & drink-stop and a roaring camp-fire.
Welcomes back to INSATIABLE, FLUID MOVEMENT & Steve, then a 
salute to MIDNIGHT.
Screw SS praised ROWDY for "raising the bar tonight"... "look at the
environment of this spot". The drink-stop was well stocked, & the R.A.
has done a magnificent job with the weather.
Sergeant ROWDY's 1st charge was for SHAFTED & the warnings for 
oncoming cyclone 'Debbie', then in the same vein, one for REAR ENTRY
suffering the 'hell hath no fury like a woman scorned' routine.
1815 saw the 1st 'Swiss Cheese' Factory in Switzerland, Napoleon 
defeated at Waterloo ...... & please be inclusive!! ..... the year of 1230
on the Islamic calender.
FASCINATOR had a drink for 'being a dick', & BAD HEAD JOB for 
coming (was that cumming?) in his hijab. HALF A BAR for, after all 
these years at Hash, not knowing where the run was, & CRUTCHLESS
got lost in the gutter. Juri said "he had to go work", & that prompted 
NORMAL to charge him for 'School Teachers actually going to WORK'.
Juri had another one for 'old runners', then was presented with
his bag of 'old runners'. MOUNTIE stayed upright for the whole run, 
& JITTERBUG, one for her designer Italian boots.
GILF charged SS for the 'threesome in the riverbed', but SS thought
that a threesome was a bit too long ago to remember.
Charges also for HEAD HUNTER thinking that NORMAL was 
'such a Gentleman', but he only took his hat off because of the 
bottle opener in the brim. DUMB & DUMBER demanded a 'hearing'
as Throstle was severely hampered in his run.

Next week - Awards Night at the Old Colonist's Club.

PS. On the return journey, the 'author' wanted to turn left & take the 
road back toward Creswick, however the main (back seat) navigator
insisted on a right turn, that "this will take us back to 5 Ways" - 
sure, via South Bendigo !! After another 'traveller' & a few more K's 
of gravel road (no wonder THE BILL didn't go tonight), we sailed past
Adekite Camp, to eventually come out of the bush a couple of K's
north of the old Dean Pub !!  Mmmmmm ........

Monday, March 20, 2017

20 - 3 -'17                    Run 1814                 Lal Lal

SHAFTED's run at 219 Coal Mine Rd .... waiting .... waiting, then the Postie
arrives - no, it's the Hare at 7PM on the Postie's Bike. SHAFFY went on 
about the 'short run', but didn't mention that we'd need a torch !!
Everyone onto the 'Winnebago', with SILIC at the helm (needed some
persuasion from Co-pilot SHAFFY to stay on the centre of the road) & 
onwards towards Bungal. REAR ENTRY needed some persuasion also,
to "get off the fuckin' bus Greenie!!" with the walkers.
13 eager athletes took to the trail like 'seagulls onto a hot chip'. Trail was
obviously set 'at speed' on the Postie bike, with easily a bag of Limil
to each mark. SHAFTED thought PLUCKA looked pretty good in her 
red outfit, & probably even better out of it. He gave us a little bit of
Geology 101 as we passed the tailing heap. The run was largely bereft
of halts (unless they took off as this "author" arrived), but one was at 
the grave of 6 yr old Mary Patterson, who died of pneumonia.
Back at the circle, NUMMY had welcomes back for HER VAGESTY,
Foster, who looked after the tail-enders.
SS thought that screwing SHAFTED would be an 'interesting excercise' -
but what a run we had. Just happened to be 2-1/2 X 5 or 6, & we arrived
back in the dark of night.The walk was well set, but obviously set at speed,
as per the large markings & SHAFFY was covered in Limil. The terrain was 
terrific, & at one point MASTABAIT wanted to go yabbying. NORMAL
pointed out the kangaroo in the paddock, but it was only on the 
Aussie flag.
Sergeant ROWDY took to the floor & charged MOUNTIE for her
St Patrick's Day 'pisshead' voice, then HEAD HUNTER & Mum Sheilagh
as being the face of Ireland for Paddy's Day. 
Extremely sad to hear of SORRY's health woes - we're thinking of her.
TEFLON was next - got a charge for being stupid.
ROWDY's sniffyc*nts of 1814 was the London Beer Flood, where a 
large vat of Porter burst, demolished buildings & killed 9 people, but
I'm surprised he didn't mention the very 1st Cricket Match at Lord's on 
22nd June, annnnd, where were you 2, PUSBUCKET & FOP??
GLIDER relayed a charge from EXIT for SHAFTED, having the run in
La La Land, & SHAFFY took an extra one for LITTLE EVIL being
in La La Land for the last 20 years. HALF A BAR (the staunch CFA
Volunteer) who made the Campers move the BBQ into the centre of
the creek on a Total Fire Ban day a couple of years ago, promptly
burnt the sheep at last weekend's fundraiser bash.
NUMMY celebrated having another Gary (Foster), as well as the 
dog Gary. PLUCKA drank up for laying on the bus bed, with all the
blokes around, & QUICK DICK charged for asking Coach Captain
NORMAL to take a photo of Mother-in-Law Sheilagh on her way
to the Airport "to make sure she's gone!!"
DUMBER had a drink for mistaking the 'porcelain penguin' for a 
cat on the Wendouree Parade walk. NUMMY was laying in bed with
DUMB & DUMBER (the morning person), when there was a text from
MOUNTIE - "send DUMB - the batteries on my dildo are flat".

That'll do - you've had a fair go!!

Next week's run - ROWDY's "MIDNIGHT" Run at Slatey Creek.
                                               Don't forget that the bridge is out. 

Tuesday, March 14, 2017

13 - 3 -'17                Run 1813               Park Hotel

Committee Run - but where's the freakin' Committee? Stand-in's everywhere.
NUMMY took charge & welcomed Shielagh, then welcomes back for Eleanor
15 Super Athletes & 5 or 6 Walkers took to the streets of the "not so fabulous"
west, leaving a couple of bar flys to breast the bar.
On the run, we saw where REAR ENTRY has started to dump some of his TV
garbage, at the gravel end of Longley St. NUMMY came across the back of the
Golf Driving Range, with what looked like a rolled up sock down the front of 
the camel-toe, finally to retrieve a couple of golf balls from "down below" - 
lucky they didn't slide away to get lost amongst the 'sweat of the run'.
Back at the On After, was a welcome charge to the Irish 'Shielagh', & a 
welcome back to 'Eleanor' - PHUCKWIT's vacated early.
HALF A BAR proved that he could actually count past 10.
Sniffyc*nts of 1813 - well, the first lot of wool from Aus. sent to UK -
thought it might have been Blaxland & Wentworth over the Blue Mountains, 
or Redmond Barry b June 7- eh ROWDY??
MOUNTIE went on & on with a Union rant about the 8 Hr Day - 
"Whadawewant Whendawee Wannit?"
Stand-in Screw THE BILL made it a joint one for NUM NUM & DUMB.
SHAFTED on the run chased pussy, or was that a dog?
R.A. PUSBUCKET came forth to interject, opening with "I digress...." 
(who knew?) charging DUMBER for his personalised running shoes at Hash.
Think the interjection might have had a fair bit of "how long have I been at
the Bar?" about it!! 
DUMBER explained that the 'HcH' markers on the run were to denote
'Henry Headen Cuthbert'. 
Stand-in Sergeant SHAFTED said it was "like sex, just hasn't done it 
for a while". NORMAL was in for a charge or 2 - being sacked from 
everywhere including the Bus Co, & DUMBER claiming so many ran
tonight because NORMAL was in charge of the walk. SS sent an absentee
charge to Shielagh, for being at the Trout Hatchery. HALF A BAR was
charged for killing the sheep, "But they were fucked" he said.
DR DEATH & DUMBER charged each other for dangerous driving & 
no indicators. MRS DICKHEAD was charged for losing bunny rabbit
'Nibbles', NUMMY for her golf balls on the run & PEBBLES for his 
mid-week text that was supposed to be a joke.

That's it - you've had a fair go!! 

Next weeks run - SHAFTED, 219 Coal Mine Rd., Lal Lal.

Tuesday, March 7, 2017

7 - 3 -'17                     Run 1812                  5 Ways

GILF's the Hare. NUMMY's regained her voice & ready to 'raise the bar' again.
Welcome to visitor DIGIT DIGESTER, with bandaged arm, then thanks to all
the Nash Hash Committee, as we sight the 'late' Hare disappearing along 
Codes Forrest Rd., to deposit the Drink-stop.
The athletes headed off along the roads & goat tracks of the fabulous
north "east", & collected with the walkers after a fairly easy run.
Back at the circle, the first official business was to collect the poppers & 
line up, Guard of Honour style, to officially pipe in ROWDY's 1100th Run
(didn't he get a charge for that already at STUBBY's Bar ??), LOIS LANE's
800th, & SOS' 300th.
Next came DIGIT's explanation of her Hash Name - attacked in London in  '94
by a mugger, who she bit the finger of, or was it right off ?
Welcomes back to HEAD HUNTER & QUICK DICK after swanning round
on holiday in New 'Zilland', then REAR ENTRY & SILIC (who missed them
New chant - "How would you like my finger in your rear - no, no not likely"
to the tune of Hava Nagila - what key were you in BENT? While we're at it,
can we piss off that shocker "ought to be publicly pissed on" that most hate.
SS stepped up to screw GILF, & thought the run & walk were 'succinct',
(& that turned a few heads!!) & wonderful that we all arrived at the 
well stocked Drink-stop, then a very short On Home. TEFLON had a drink
to support the Hare.
Sergeant ROWDY's first charge was for Nash Hash "Volunteer turned Hero"
of last weekend REAR ENTRY, for saving a very grumpy woman on the very 
steep slope, quickly followed by DUMBER & DUMBER drinking up for
his getting the 'yank tank' stuck on the 5 Ways steep slope a few years ago.
were the next drinkers, then the Nash Hash Run Setters from Ballarat Hash.
Then came the inevitable sniffyc**ts of 1812, to which this "author(?)" was
 "severely chortled", but rose out of the ashes with, Tchaikovsky's 
Overture in Eb Major, Opus 49 also Charles Dickens born on Feb 7th. 
What else was there ROWDY? - quite a few I think, but missed in the notes.
GILF & NORMAL were next & made to sit on the ice. Tight-arsed prick
SILIC had been busy knocking the Nash Hash weekend, but quick to
line up for some cheap left-over cans of Nash Hash Splash, then SOS was
charged 'responsible' for Cops turning up each time we run from 5 Ways.
NUM NUM charged ROWDY for his wanting the incoming GM to be aware
that he didn't want a job this year, then PRECIOUS had his water charge for
being old enough for a root at the High School weekend, but still not old
enough to drink an alcohol charge. ROWDY charged Sniffyc*nt 
(aka HEAD HUNTER) & MRS D for the 'strings' hanging, after the
poppers parade. BENT NOSE charged TEFLON for his wrong directions,
then HEAD HUNTER drank up for having DUMBER weld up the bed, but
wouldn't say how it got broken. Uri & ROWDY - bit of banter about
charging for medical practise (dunno!!).

Next week - Committee run - Park Hotel.