Wednesday, October 24, 2012

The Legend of the Chicken Master

Crewsick was once a thriving gold mining town, full of hustle and bustle, riches flowing from the miners in their tens of thousands camped out around Slatey Creek: - but that was long ago.

Living memory is of bodies found floating in the lake, and 10 years of drought and pestilence, bushfires and locust plagues, and population in decline. That is, until the Chicken Master came to the Sovereign Hash.

SOS was a humble tiler from just over the hill. He went to school, and learnt a trade, and joined the Soverign Hash to look for fun and excitement, and chicks. Oh, how he loved his chicks; well, talking about them, and thinking about them, and watching them strip. SOS was a tiler with chicks on his mind. He even found a friend named Hymen who could talk to chicks, and often take them home.

SOS endeared himself to the Sovereigh Hash, and things began to look up for Creswick, too. It rained, and the drought was broken. But alas, it kept on raining. It rained and it rained and it rained, and the water all ran into Crewick, down the Slatey Creek, and through St Georges Lake. The water picked up trees as big as ...... big trees, and threw them around like matchsticks, and washed out stone bridges, and tore through Creswick, filling houses with mud and washing away football ovals.

And then it rained again.

SOS, and the Sovereign Hash, looked to the heavens, and at each other, and found the time was right to help out Creswick, so Mrs Dickhead arranged a run in Creswick, and it was good. And the Down Downs were good, and the meal in the pub at Creswick was good, too.

Now to that run in Creswick came a couple of Chicky babes who were staying at the school of forestry in Creswick for a short time. And SOS met the chicks, and SOS liked the chicks, and the chicks liked SOS, and it looked good. So the chicks invited SOS back to their room to share a feather doona together.

And then SOS turned CHICKEN. He made up an excuse and did not go to share that feather doona.

And the chicks never returned.

And SOS was shamed, and all of the Sovereign Hash shared in his shame.

Still, SOS could not stop thinking about chicks, and a strange thing happened. He was not just CHICKEN, he was the MASTER CHICKEN, and so he referred to himself. And when he become Grand Master of the Hash, he called himself the CHICKEN MASTER, to remind us all of his shame.

And that is a true story, and the Sovereign Hash has a run at the Lake in Creswick every year to remember. And rumour has it that every now and then the ghost of his shame, wrapped in chicken wire, can be seen floating in the lake.

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