Tuesday, May 8, 2018

7 - 5 - '18        Run 1878        The Western.

DAZED & CONFUSED teamed up with Birthday Girl 
NUTCRACKER for the Hairy Run with all the wigs. 16 super
athletes took to the trail, with some confusion at the start, but
quickly sorted after a bit of cackling (aka NUTCRACKER'ing),
as she was soon to display her pink bits - this time a hair-tie
on the road. Was MOUNTIE 'on heat' (or just tying shoe-laces) 
bending over for an obvious invitation? CHRIS CROS, only a 
couple of weeks into Hash Cashing, had to abort his run, only
15 minutes in, returning to the Pub to retrieve the Cash and
Tin from the table. After a fair bit of zig-zagging round the 
local 'night-man' lanes, trail took us to the Drink-Stop at the
NUTCRACKER workshop. Numbers swelled close to 40, with 
the N.C. offspring excelling at waiter service with the chips - 
even plenty of salt & vinegar to go round (in the absence of
one BENTNOSE !!).
At the Circle, PEBBLES called out D&C for her 100 Runs.
Screw MOUNTIE said that with so much cackling & yelling
from the 2 Hares, it might as well have been 'live'.
(Apparently) GEORGE PELL-ICAN lost his virginity in the 
back of NUTCRACKER's car. MOUNTIE read out the bit from
the Drive car mag, then the limerick, & ended up giving the
the co-hares the Red HO Falcon award.
Sergeant SHAFTED called out sniffyc*nt runs - PLUCKA 181,
NUTCRACKER 40, JITTERBUG 39 & PIMP 21. It was up to
MRS QUICKDICK to take them away.
                    (Put it in your hand Mrs Murphy ..... ).
LADY TRAMP had been with the 'elite' (well, SHAFFY was 
there as well), at the Grape Escape, along with FOP
          (Put your right leg over my shoulder ....)  
          HEAD HUNTER's still got more ).
NORMAL had a charge for DUMB & DUMBER. When D&D 
was boss of the 'Sheltered Workshop - Carover BBQ', he 
regularly charged Mrs Hayes (NORMAL's Mother-in-Law)
$450 a time, regardless of needing a service or not, & not
particularly helping NORMAL's inheritance a great deal. Now
that the new guard has taken over ie: Henry, Mrs Hayes gets
told "there's no need for a service, we'll just check the oil &
water". Of course, the rebound was from DONUTS - DUMBER
was the excellent businessman, & maybe NORMAL needs
some financial advice - there's always PEBBLES at ...... umm,
....... err, shoosh, .... whisper, ..... a ..... m ..... p.
                       (U.g.l.y. ..... you're ugly).
HALF A BAR had a f*ckin' charge for f*ckin' DR f*ckin' DEATH,
since H/BAR thinks he's been dropped by the DR, "like a bag
of f*ckin' shit". He reckons the DR "got all the roots, but 
didn't try him".
SHAFTED gave NUTCRACKER the Happy 52 Birthday drink,
& wanted to know if the Shop was called Taboo or should it
be Tabooz. 
                        (Happy Birthday f*ck you ...... ).
PUSBUCKET charged DR DEATH for his height of decadence,
driving the Jag all of 150 M from Pub to Drink-Stop, & of 
course, when 1 DR drinks ........ !
                         (No, no, bad, bad ...... ).
CHRIS CROS gave HALF A BAR a drink on account of the 
Budget coming from Morrisons (?), then DUMBER to 
MOUNTIE for sending the F.O. message re: the football,
when he replied, "you mean Fantastic Outcome?" - seems
Melbourne won for a change.

Next weeks run - 1879 - Co-hares MASTABAIT & NORMAL
from the Bunch of Grapes, Pleasant St. - (bet it's BAIT's car!).

DIMWIT left us with his customary zinger - similarity of Cher 
to Ballarat's weather - neither is fucking Sonny/sunny.


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