Apologies were made for Deep Heat not being able to make it up the stairs to the circle. Boner arrived late and apologies were also given with the announcement that Carpet Burns is back. Welcomes backs went to Carpet Burns, Pebbles, Squizzy, and Beer f%ck. Sniffy runs were awarded to Teflon on 444, NBCL on 313, Bad Hair Day on 1313, Pebbles on 669 and Jus Cum on 300, who also received a commemorative T-shirt. New runner Jacinta received her first down down and when asked “who made you cum?”, she indicated Cat Flaps.
Mountie wanted to begin her screw, but Pigs Arse was nowhere to be found, so Pus Bucket, you’ll do. Matthew 2323 was quoted with mention of justice, mercy, and faithfulness. The trail was noted to have lots of halts to keep us together, just maybe not every 5 sec as we kept running up everyone’s arses. At the drink stop there was no petrol crisis, but we did have a beer crisis. We ran out of beer! Jacinta had to drink cider. Shame! Cat Flaps and Bent nose were called to the front. At this point, Deep Heat arrived to the cheer of the crowd. He told us all to f%ck off. Back to our best 2 engineers, they had a car crash, both died and showed up at the gates to heaven. After meeting God, they were told that heaven wasn’t for them and that they should go down there. While down there, they fixed everything, so that everything was amazing. God also wanted things fixed, so he asked them to move back upstairs and threatened that he’ll sue if they didn’t come. They answered, “where are you going to get a lawyer.
NBCL began with the observation that Nutcrackers Grandfather was on wall. He used to tell her bedtime stories, that always began, “once upon a double time”. Disco was charged for helping a little boy who had lost his dad. When he asked the boy what’s he like? He answered, “big tits, and whisky”. When a homeless guy was asked “Knock Knock” he answered, “who’s there?” I thought you were homeless. Pigs Arse was charged for scheduling the circle up 5 flights of stairs, Precious said “he’s not here” so “you’ll do”. Pigs Arse was collecting the pizza’s, perhaps he doesn’t know that delivery can be arranged. Dumb then charged himself and announced that he had a lovely motion this morning, prior to the general business. Immaculate Conception was charged for being a good Samaritan, helping those in need by not having a lockable fuel cap. Precious was also charged for being the only dickhead with a car with a lockable fuel cap, and crashing it. The teachers were called to the front by Pigs Arse for a presentation. Some union shirts were distributed among Jacinta, Mrs D and others. After asking “Where’s Fang?” Jus Cum answered “he’s not here”, so she was charged. Jus cum and Spartacus scored another charge, after the traumatic birth of baby Wee Problem, Spartacus was told that his wife didn’t make it. The punchline was that he’ll bring you the one she did make. Jus Cum was also charged as her new shirt was black, not red like the union members. Bent told us that Hash used to only have 1 perfect c%nt, Normal. But now BP is in St John’s getting a perfect vagina. The comeback was that now she is hoping to get a perfect dick. Mountie dissed the ES staff, and Jacinta was asked to explain why, People Pleaser, Jus Cum and Pink Bits were only worth half as much as teachers. For our last charge, Spencer charged Mastabait, as his princess is going to Spain for 4 weeks to walk the Camino. All who walk this trail are asked to carry a pebble, to represent carrying a burden. Since Mastabait is not going, he asked Nummy to bless a stone for her to take.
Next weeks run is in memory of Midnight (not at midnight). It will be hosted by Rowdy, with the run taking off from St George’s Lake and the On After at the Farmers Arms Creswick.
On On
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