H3 Run 2018   25 Jan '21  Union Jack Res.

The Spencer Hocking "Straya Day Eve" Bush Run.

Bit of confusion for the 2nd week - some turning off

at the wrong spot, others not going far enough along

Elizabeth. Spence was already installed with tables

set up & flags flying.

GM Donuts was the first heckled - creases ironed

into the Hash Shirt.

The Hare told us about 'some hills', there may be 

1 or 2 on backs, but don't ask how far it is. He added

that the Weather Gods had favoured us, seeing as it

was supposed to be bucketting down, & assured 

Campaspee that there were no snakes.

Just then 'the late' Shafted made his entry.

Trail kept both groups together until the creek, then

the runners found the extent of a 'couple' of hills.

Wasn't long before the walkers came by 

Drink-stop Policeman Pusbucket, standing guard 

over the beer & chips, then came the sweaty runners.

At the Circle, first of all a Welcome Back for Pebbles.

Sniffy Runs for Headhunter & Quickdick 151,

Num Num 656 & Evie 21. (They're stupid ....).

Bentnose was up for screwing, starting with "A very

fine run" - from "he who walked !!" Clockwise amongst

the many mineshafts, until the fjord, when "I took charge"

(Bullshit, it all sounds like bullshit ...). There was no

mention of the Southern Cross to guide us on trail.

Score 87, same as the humidity. (Shitty trail ....).

Quickdick charged Plucka for not taking up the offer

of a lift to the On On, seeing as the prize was a blow job.

After his earlier grand entrance, Shaffy was charged

for parking next to a tree, not being able to open 

his door.    (Put it in your hand Mrs Murphy ....).

Nummy had a charge for Dr Death - "not here" says

Just Cum - you'll do !! Dr Death had commented on a

"pretty flash shirt" - since when had he become

a fashionista ?        (Hymn, fuck him ..... ).

Spence had a drink for forgetting to mention the double

151 runs of Headhunter & Quickdick. (Pain in the arse..)

Mountie was charging Donuts, when an uproar began

with a rousing "God Save The Queen".

Dumber had BP & Pauline out the front - "They're not 

Aussies, who do they think they are ?"

             (Build a bonfire ..... put the Kiwi on top ..... ).

Nummy had a drink for flashing her gash.

              (Do your tits hang low ........... ).

Quickdick gave Nummy another drink - "who's driving

the Stang home tonight ?"

Pebbles charged hare Spence for (summet - can't read

"me" own writing) why make all the new tracks?

               (All Australians ........ ).

Nummy bought her 'old man' Dumber a drink - her Dad

always used Old Spice, & if he hadn't, she might never

have been here !! Penny Farthing was next for saying

that she'd never come back to Buninyong again.

Donuts had the last charge for Nummy of Indiginai

background - When you're approached by the Abos with

an invite to a Corroboree, it's not to a Car Robbery.

                      (She's a harriette  ............... ).

Bentnose gave Dimwit's amateur standing one hell of a 

shake, with his Blonde Double Entendre gag, that was 

supposed to sleigh 'em, but no-one got it.

Next week's run 2019 - Hare Spartacus from the 

Grapes Pub, Grant Street.

Spence had tasty Chicken pieces, bread rolls & salads

for mains, followed by the obligatory profiteroles - nice.

 Run 2017  18 Jan ' 21.  Half a Bar - Dolly's Crk Rd.

Impromptu Stand-in, for the absent Stand-in, for the 

MIA Scribe. 6:30 start went out the window due to some

of the wayward travellers.

The Trail Master called the reverence, as the GM was left

searching for more Stand-ins .... Sergeant & Screw.

Half a Bar said that the run was "about 4 km", but turned

out to be closer to 6, with Bar Licker saying, "Good luck,

the marks are the same colour as the road !!"

Following routine, the walkers were sent straight to the 

Cemetery for the Drink-stop, with some short-cutting via

the long grass in "snake lane". Beer & chips had largely

been consumed as the runners began to appear, & many 

walkers had already started back, due to the cold wind.

Those who stayed on, had the annual Down Down to

celebrate the life of Half a Bra.  Dumber & Dr Death

provided the shuttle vehicles for the return, with 9 in the

"Ram" & Foxy-dog CC taking a turn at the wheel.

At the On After, there was no need this year to scrape off

"what was growing" on the BBQ - Bar Licker had already

cooked in the kitchen !!

At the Circle, welcomes back were for Fergie, Shafted,

Narelle, Campaspee, & Dimwit. (U.G.L.Y.... you're ugly).

Sniffy Runs, Spencer Hocking asked Half a Bar for the 

sniffycunts of today's date ... 18-1-'21. Digit sum of 13,

square root of 169 .... who knew? 

Half a Bar's Birthday 21-1-'21, he'll be 72 ... digit sum of

....... blah blah !! Just Cum, Wee Problem & Dr Death

all add up to 69, which is the digit .......... !!

SS 1750 runs in his 80th year. 

                     (His fore skins hangs down ....... ).

Mountie 1169, but should that be 1269 ?

                  (This is your Down Down song ......).

Shafted was Stand-in Screw, & began saying that it was

his 2nd time screwing Half a Bar ...... What a run !!

The banter went to & fro' about "Tommy" wanting only 

a half a bag of ice, (well he is a Spielvogel), & it was too

late for the Indian Shop etc. No-one got lost on the run,

even though it was marked in the same colour as the 

gravel, & we have just run it for the 38th time. 

Score 10.5, number of years since Half a Bra passed.

                       (Shitty Trail ...... ).

Birthday drinks - Donuts gave Half a Bar another one,

SS took one for Mastabait's, & one for Donuts.

                     (Hashy Birthday f*ck you .... ).

It was time for Dimwit's zinger .........

      What comes from onion & beans ?  Tear gas.

Dimwit had a drink for fronting up to The Market for

last week's run, & NBCL had one for The Bill.

                       (You're stupid ............ ).

A few wrong turns on the way out, got Nutcracker a 

drink as "Nagivator", then Fergie delivered the charge to

"all these lost people". Nutcracker then blamed Dimwit 

for the 20 minute wait, & as he got into the car, he said

to D&C, "it's like a pig sty in here".

Dr Death called out Half a Bar for backing into his

Scooby Van.         (You're stupid ........... ).

Pauline charged Mountie & Pusbucket for saying that

the only dietary requirement for the 2020 Run is "beer".

        (Finnish drinking song ..... Nnnnnoooooo !!).

Paul Bearer said that he had seen the most beautiful

parrot driving tonight, & Lois Lane's reply, "They get

their license for anything don't they?"

Dimwit claimed that Half a Bar's ute was just as bad as

D&C's car.

Fashionista Pusbucket, "bought the missus a drink",

saying that her "gear" clashed tonight, then Half a Bar

was the only one since SS to have a crease pressed in 

his jeans.   Was he wearing a pair of Pauline's 

3 quarter pants ??          (To piss, for cunt ..... ).

Next Week's Run, Hare Spence from Union Jack Res,

off Elizabeth St., Buninyong.

Bill of Fare from the Bar Licker kitchen - 

         Bread rolls & 2 tasty casseroles in gravy, 

         snags/rissoles & the other, beef, followed by

         Sticky Date in syrup & cream.

That's enough.

         

 

 

Jason Kelly

Admin

  · otSposn1shaored  · 

Better late than never...

BH3 Run # 2016: Her Vagisty – St Georges Lake Creswick (11/01/20201)

A late change of venue saw 35 Hashers rock up to a crowded St Georges lake, the 30° heat the reason for the shift away from the Market Hotel. Unfortunately, no-one told The Bill who, after waiting alone at the Market for 30 minutes, popped down Park St and asked Randolph the Red where the run was being held.

12 runners and 15 walkers set off on the same trail, which looped around through the Koala Park and back to the lake. Trail then split, with the runners enduring the pine tree covered hills behind the lake and the walkers sticking to the road at the lake, with the drink stop situated up the steps the other side of the overspill. After arriving late, The Bill managed to catch the pack just as they were arriving at the DS.

Back at the circle a number of Hashers took the opportunity to cool off in the lake, before Donuts called for reverence. Welcome backs included Fluid Movement, Fang, Big Dog and Dr Death  get a life 

Once again, DnC handed the book to Spencer Hocking to announce SniffyCunt runs: Plucka (292), Fop (424), and Just Cum(34)  no, no, no, bad, bad, bad 

Hash was then interrupted by a young chap wearing socks and thongs who felt the urge to join in with us. He was quickly labelled “Go Home” and charged  hymn, hymn, fuck hymn  He did such a poor job skolling his beer that he was challenged to a race against Fluid Movement  10, 9, 8…. ; Fluid Movement won easily and “Go Home” was summarily told to “fuck off”

Bent Nose then started his screw, describing the trek though the Koala Park as “very impressive”, but was once again concerned with the lack of Koalas. He gave the run a score of 1.6km, which he believes is the circumference of the lake.  shitty trail 

Sergeant Quick Dick began, charging Donuts and Wee Problem for designing the Donuts shirts out of plastic material that doesn’t breathe in the hot weather.  Mrs Murphy 

Other charges included: The Bill (that little piggy went to the Market hotel); Just Cum, Dr Death and The Bill (not wearing Hash gear)  give it a blow 

Normal was charged for barracking for the Windies in the cricket, and Dumb was charged because the ABC commentary team referred to the Smith-Labuschagne partnership as “Dumb and Dumber”. Mountie charged GILF for the MAGA riots in the USA and Mrs D charged BP because the BBQ wasn’t clean enough.  they’re the meanest 

We then tucked into BBQ, salads and pavlova whilst watching the sun set over Creswick

Next week’s run: Tommy Half a Bar - 225 Dollys Creek Rd, Morrisons

 

Jason Kelly

tSsponsorlen

BH3 Run # 2015: Committee Run – Black Hill lookout (04/01/20201)

Thirty-seven Hashers gathered atop Black Hill to usher in 2021. Fifteen runner set off on trail (9 and 6 ) for a short run down one side of the hill, around the base and back up the other side to the drinks stop back at the start.

After the run, Donuts welcomed back Paul Bearer, Remote and Normal  get a life 

DnC then passed the book to Spencer to announce SniffyCunt runs: Just Cum (33) and Remote (393). Spencer also then acknowledged DnC (218) Nutsy (164), Her Vag (173) Wee Problem (29 and himself (1244) (All digit sum of 11 – palindromic)

In the absence of Bent Nose, Donuts then called on first Spencer, then Rowdy (who both told him to get fucked), and finally Remote to do the screw. “I arrived late and Pus Bucket said to just drop down to the bottom where you’ll find trail. I found trail but it was just white dots, not arrows, and I had no idea which way to go. I couldn’t hear anyone calling, not even Mountie, so I ended up doing it all backwards”.  Shitty trail 

Sergeant Quick Dick had lost his pen and paper, so just has a couple of charges:

Remote was charged for the best Screw of 2021 and Mrs D was charged for talking instead of singing. DnC was called up for parking in a disabled spot, it made sense when Dr Rowdy got out of the passenger side (that’s how she got the disable sticker), and Spencer Hocking was charged for being “numerically bothersome”  There’s a game called 20 toes 

Charges from the floor: CrisCros charged Plucka and Paul Bearer, apparently Black Hill was originally called “Bowden”. Lois charged Pauline for losing the soap in the public showers, and Bar Licka charged Shafter as Tommy had ditched him for a poker game.  this is your down down song 

Highlight of the evening was Rowdy, who charged Pebbles for impersonating “Gold Member” so convincingly that 3 Hash Tarts (Mountie, Just Cum and Narelle) all turned up to the NYE party dressed as Bat Girl. So he didn’t drink alone, Mountie charged Paul Bearer as Plucka was comparing his plumbs with a giant mango, then Fascinator charged Lois as she was using grapes to compare Pauline’s plumbs.  Mrs Murphy 

Next week’s run: Her Vagesty from the St George's Lake

 

Jason Kelly

Admin

  · 2i JanutaSpooelargdyn siact iao1lcut8:thnrat5e2d  · 

BH3 Run # 2014 – Teflon and GILF - 10 Taylor Court, Invermay

There nothing like a magnificent Hash bush run to break the doldrums of Merryneum*; and this was a magnificent bush run! A pack of 14 runners and 7 walkers set off from the residence of Teflon and GILF, crossed Alkera Rd to Tanuda St and then completed a 4.5km loop through the beautiful Nerrina bushland. The well-planned run saw the runners and walkers converge simultaneously up Jindabyne St to the drinks stop adjacent the water towers. Mountie was heard to comment that the trail “separated the men from the boys,” which was an unusual comment considering 2 female Hash runners were first to the DS. At the DS we were treated to an abundance of tasty beer and snacks while we all relived some of the hilarity of the Xmas run the week before (I’m still laughing Nummy )

Back at the Teflon-GILF homestead Donuts welcomed back Big Dog (aka ScoMo), Penny Farthing and Rowena  get a life 

The GM then announced that due to multiple absences tonight’s stand-ins included Rowdy (Screw), Spencer (Sergeant) and Mrs D (Choir Master).

SniffyCunt Runs included NBCL (50), Mrs D (650) and last week’s SniffyCunt runs were Donuts (767), Campaspee (55) and Her Vag (171)

With virtually no notice Rowdy began the screw; “DnC drove in slowly trying to stop trail, all we discovered was that it crossed Alkera Rd. Lovely, never seen before trail that hasn’t been ruined by motorbikes. Lots of wallabies and wobbly bits" (9 of the 14 runners were ).

Rowdy then finished by saying that whatever he said would never be as good as Shafted’s screw 12 months ago (  Poly-Tetra-Fluoro-Ethylene is Teflon’s chemical equation  ). He then awarded this week’s run the ultimate score… 69  Shitty Trail 

Spencer Hocking (Stand-in Sergeant) acknowledged birthdays: Quick Dick (absent- Big Dog will do), Dr Death (absent – all Drs drink) and Jesus (Tommy you’ll do)

No Hash gear – Big Dog, Penny Farthing, Just Cum, Wee Problem (it was noted that Spartacus has failed to properly clothe Just Cum and Wee Problem)  No No No, Bad Bad Bad 

Other charges included:

Mountie charged Rowena as she doesn’t like her butt sniffed. Teflon charged Mountie and Pus Bucket for arriving before The Bill. Just Cum was charged for yelling “I won” instead of “OnOn” after finding trail after a Halt, then Tommy tried to tell a joke (not worth repeating).  They’re the meanest 

Tommy was asked multiple time what Rowena’s name was, they ended up exchanging shirts so that Rowena had hash gear  There’s a game called 20 toes 

We then acknowledge this as the last run of 2020  Fuck off ya Cunt 

Next week’s run; Committee run from Black Hill lookout, on after is at La Porchetta

* Merryneum:  a portmanteau of “Merry Christmas” and “perineum” describing the void between Christmas and New Year