Thursday, June 25, 2020

Run 1987, Zoom#13, CoVid #11, Monday 22 June 2020, Hares Head Hunter and Quick Dick, venue Eureka Pool. (Apologies in the delay of the scribe update)
A run in the fabulous East which set off in an even more Easterly direction. A well-marked run that meandered through the mires of Mt Xavier. The reward at the return of the rigorous run was a refuge resplendent with refreshments.
Attendees at the Zoom meeting were Spence, SS, Bent, BP, Half a Bar, Rowdy, NBCL, D&C, Nutcracker, Mountie (reluctant Pus Bucket), Donuts, Mrs D, Jitterbug, Fascinator, Num, Dumb, Head Hunter, Quick Dick, Beer Phuck, Fang, Fop , Campaspe, Pauline, Lois and Bitch Face,
After thirteen Zoom meeting across three months one would think that Zoom etiquette would be on the improve, but alas, all this poor scribe heard for the first 18 minutes was about 6 simultaneous conversations. Highlights of these early cacophonous moments included a Tommy duplication (showing both the conventional front on view and a fetching profile view), as well as the “Satin couple” (Nutsy and NBCL) who looked fresh from a round on the workbench. (see pics)

Order was called for and the Screw (Bent Nose) announce that he was opposed to Hares (Bent’s internet connection was patchy and I missed the punchline, though it was a reference to HH and QD’s Zoom background)
Highlights of the run included the Fabulous East and the first ever trail up Lalor Street
Lowlights mentioned were a confusing trail at York Street and a Wetty and shitty trail. (Blame the RA). Quote from Bent Nose “Who knew that there were wetlands in the East”, and “it was fortunate that Mrs D was there to point out the wet spots”. There was mention that Head Hunter thought it was hilarious that Mrs D had wet shoes.
Half way through describing his love for the pink pinecone marking Bent Nose's internet connection failed completely and we were all left in suspense.
He came back just in time for his “coup de grace”…. The overall score: 007 (Bent originally had a Zoom background showing HH and QD at a masquerade ball…visual gags don’t work)
Donuts asked the Keeper of the Book (D&C) if there were any significant runs. Unfortunately D&C was muted, or munted, or in a deep coma (see pic), and it took 5 minutes to rouse her. After all that wait she announced that there were “no significant runs”.
(By now Zoom time was running out)
The Sergeant (Quick Dick) threw forward a few quick charges:
Donuts was charge because “Evil didn’t attack Campaspee’s dogs”, and Beer Phuck was charged for turning up Sunday and not staying to help dig out the ivy plant.
Charges from the masses included:
Palindromic Date “20-6-20”
Mountie ran the trail on Monday with Head Hunter and wasn’t offered a beer.
HH rebounded this charge as Mountie helped the Hash consume all 4 slabs at the DS on Saturday
Beef Phuck didn’t get a beer on Sunday either – “no beers left but lots of fucks available”
Donuts charged the Hares for taking him past the dam he almost drowned in when he was 4
Nutsy charged Head Hunter because the Irish ruined the AFL
D&C was charged throwing her money away on the trail AGAIN!!
Bitch Face accused all the Victorians for ruining it for everyone
Quick Dick responded by saying that Tassie still has the Spanish Flu and COVID is still a century away
Next week’s Hares are Just Cum and Wee Problem at a venue TBC

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