Bob Maika

2h0 iOctobf44onfler arulfti 10:40u1  · 

RUN #2057, 18 OCTOBER 2021

HARE: JUZ CUM

LOCATION: NUGGETY DAM

DISCLAIMER – I don’t vouch for the accuracy of this blog given I was ‘lured’ into it…… but then, why spoil good stories with facts!!

26 hashers rocked up the Nuggety Dam where Juz Cum had set-up the On On with aid from Spartacus and Pus Bucket and Mountie who had got a fire going……. tip, don’t f=]+k with a bloke’s fire!! Some concerns for Big Dog’s shinny flash black car picking its way over 4WD tracks.

Run brief – approx. 4.6km run, marked in yellow, left and right (Rowdy did you get it?). Walkers, “just go for a walk around the dam!”……. WTF?? We want ‘walkers rights’.

Hash Circle – Welcomes back, Penny Farthing and Precious. “Get a life”.

MOOT

Mountie commenced shagging the run when she cracked a joke about Juz Cum going to Melbourne to get double waxed.

Venue 22, Terrain 20, Markings (lack of) -22, DS 10, Groovy Factor ?

Mountie reckoned the groovy factor scored highly as Rowdy flashed his schlong whilst ‘relieving’ himself in some ‘bush’. “Shitty trail”.

Sniffy Runs – Spencer Hocking got Juz Cum for one of his palindromic equations 169 “Take it up the arse”. Pauline 323 and Juz Cum 77. “She’s the meanest”. Precious 175, Big Dog 49. “His one skin hangs down to his two skin”.

Sergeant charges:

Rowdy fined SS and Penny Farthing for his run at 5 Ways where they were the only two to book a seat at the On-After at the Top Eureka and didn’t turn up. So Rowdy milked this charge for all he could claiming he was out of pocket for the two empty seats trying to curry sympathy……. and got none!! “Give us an A”. Shafted (holding a ‘twig’ – we all know how visual jokes go down) charged BP, who wasn’t in attendance, you’ll do Bentnose, likening the twig to body image these days. “Build a bonfire”. Mountie charged Juz Cum who bought a new car and not long after getting the car took it back to the dealer claiming there was something wrong with the car. It works fine during the day, but won’t go at night time. When the mechanic asked JC to describe what she does she said “during the day I put it in ‘D’ for DAY and it goes fine. At night I put in ‘N’ for NIGHT and it won’t move”?? Mrs D made some comment that this joke was told yesterday at Ladies Hash and JC still doesn’t get it?? “No no no, bad bad bad”. Big Dog charged for parking his flash car facing up a steep, rutted 4WD track ready for a quick exit. Someone quipped “that’s okay Nutcracker and D & C could help Big Dog with their snatch strap”. “She’s a Harriette”. Criss Cross said something?? Mountie charged Nutcracker and D&C for outsider trading i.e. going to Melbourne to get their Brazilians done (double waxed). “There’s a game called 20 toes”. Spencer Hocking charged Dim wit for being out of the circle and asked him for one of his ‘lame’ jokes. Dim Wit – What do Mexicans say to their chickens – “Oh lay”. Spencer compelled to tell his own ‘lame’ joke, “Why didn’t the toilet paper cross the road? It got caught in the crack”!! Dim subjected all to a second ‘lame’ Mexican joke, “What do you call a Mexican without a car? Car loss!! “Asshole, asshole, a soldier I will be”. D&C was asked how she wanted to be addressed by i.e. Dazed and Confused or D&C. “D&C”! Mrs D added but she wants the A N D not the &. Mrs D was charged for wearing two bras. Some debate whether she should wear more bras or less??” “Do you tits hang low”. Mrs D charged for turning 50 later in the week, along with other birthday boys Precious and Big Dog. “Hashy birthday”.

The on-after BBQ turned into chicken, salad and baked (in the fire) potatoes due to BBQ being AWOL. If you need the hash BBQ for your run you need to give Fascinator a week’s notice as he is a real estate agent and we all know how slowly they work, as he keeps it at Learmonth.

Pauline (2IC Haberdasher – does Lois Lane know you are a making haberdasher announcements without her?) ‘modelled’ hash shorts (bloody good looking model too) complete with hash foot on the bum. Sizes XS, M, L, XL, XXL, XXXL. Cost $30 and Just Cum modelled leggings with the hash feet on them. Cost $55 and the leggings are available in full length and ¾ length. More details will be sent out by email and orders will be taken from next week.

Let Nutcracker know if you plan to attend the Mitiamo hash weekend, 5 - 7th November.

Next week’s run is listed as Mrs D’s, however Mrs D stepped in to do a run during lockdown so this remains TBA.