8 - 4 - '19          Run 1926         Orkney Crt. 

Hash 40 for FANG's Prize Night at home. HEAD HUNTER was
Stand-in Choirmaster for the old man, & called the reverence.
PEBBLES made his pen-ultimate welcome, then FANG told us
about 'so much bush' close to the city, but there was already a 
lot of bush amongst us. It's marked in lime & chalk & there's a
special stop. We left the bar flys to get refreshed, & soon 
found the 1st stop 'Ya dreamin' gubber', then on to the graves
of HEAVY & DOBBO. SS broke the minute silence, leading .......
"these feet, these hands ......"    On on, HEAVY & ARSO.
We reached the Great Northern Drink-stop in the rotunda, just
as the rain started - sadly no travellers for NORMAL. The bar 
flys arrived in 2 cars, but still had to walk in 400m, much to the 
chagrin of SILIC & GLIDER.
At the Circle, PEBBLES welcomed back HALF A BAR & PIMP
(seeing as he's only here at Christmas & Easter).
                      (This is your down down song ......... ).
D&C and SHAFTED were next for their Birthday charges.
                       (Hashy Birthday fuck you ......... ).
REAR ENTRY was called out to give a quick rendition of the
Richmond Song, but launched into 'We Are Geelong' instead.
                       (Give us an A ......... ).
Best Hash Screw MOUNTIE was next for her pen-ultimate. She
presented the Drive mag to Hare FANG, saying "end of an era,
now there's a new hope". She said that she enjoyed the run,
would've enjoyed it more, had it not been for her sore arse.
She pointed out FANG's 1 black & 1 neon sock, then told us 
what she'd learned on the run - D&C likes a dump, heard the 
full boring story of Golden Point Cricket Club from it's 
beginning, & ROWDY had found the dead people.
FANG's position on the leader board was next to HER FANNY.
The limerick ....... 'they tried dog style on the cleaned shag
pile, & all he got was severe carpet burns'. By now,
QUICKDICK had appeared in street clothes & led the ......
                           (Shitty trail ............. ).
Serg. SHAFTED presented ROWDY with the utensil remnants
from his Slatey run.
Sniffycunt runs were headed up by Ballarat Hash inaugural
runner ... to quote SHAFFY .."that know it all c*nt BENTNOSE"
HALF A BAR 1200, BP 1150, FASCINATOR 101 & 
BITCHFACE 50 (& she was pissed off  "Oh, only half of 
FASCINATOR?).
                                  (Get a life ........... ).
SHAFTED called out PEBBLES for 'something else' that he'd 
missed ..... Run 1926 - 1926 the year Mum Shafted was born.
DR DEATH charged FANG for having the Drink-stop so far in
from the car park.
HALF A BAR had the cotton wool patch on his right ear - was
it from when he fought Mike Tyson?
SILIC had a drink to celebrate the win of horse One Ball.
                              (They're the meanest ........... ).
SILIC charged PUSBUCKET for yelling out after searching for
the Drink-stop, "I've found it, oh no, it's only a wheelbarrow".
MOUNTIE had HALF A BAR out again - 1200 runs must be 
about 6,000k. DR DEATH gave FANG a drink for having the 
exact No of cans, but PEBBLES said that SQUIZZY didn't get 
one. They pointed out that MOUNTIE wouldn't have a sore 
arse, if she didn't have her beany on backwards - SNNAAAG !!
FANG always has to park it in Marina.
                     (There's a game called 20 toes .......... ).
BENTNOSE charged 'the gay boys with the gay legs', PIMP &
STUBBY, & MOUNTIE to HALF A BAR again - 1200 runs 
would be about 6,000 stubbies.
HER VAG was next for all of her different coloured finger 
nails, & then FOP had been perusing FANG's shed stuff - 
Drag (drop) sheets on one of the storage bins.
DUMB(er) & DUMBER had SHAFTED out for phoning up while
he sat outside the wrong address, & then HALF A BAR called
SILIC & GLIDER out together - GLIDER had 'dog carpet' on 
board & said "SILIC can't sit on that !!"
GLIDER produced his sight gag (on paper) for MASTABAIT,
about the marauding seal.
                    (Put it in your hand Mrs Murphy ...... ).
FASCINATOR said HALF A BAR's 1200 runs meant him 
saying 'fuck' 22,400 times.
                    (Hymn, hymn, fuck hymn .......... ).
DUMBER charged CHRIS CROS saying that Collingwood was 
only 1 game in front of Melbourne, then MOUNTIE again, 
about HALF A BAR's 1200 - that means 35 people each week
to say hello / good-bye to - 42,000 times.
It was BENTNOSE's shout to BP - she said on the walk "we're
in the dead end", & then SHAFTED said to ROWDY, "where all
of your ex patients are", but HALF A BAR said, "No ROWDY,
there's 3 of yours at Morrisons, so I'm not game to send 
BAR LICKER to you".
                        (You're ugly ...... ).
NUMMY was out for a drink - a bit slow to get onto why 
HALF A BAR had his ear patch on.
                        (You're so fuckin' dumb ........... ),
PUSBUCKET told us how DUMBER had been to a car show &
took 40 selfies, then MOUNTIE back to HALF A BAR - 1200 
runs, 1200 charges.
FANG & DIMWIT were in competition for the worst Dad joke -
FANG's, Just in Beaver, & DIMWIT's, Lesbian with a hippo -
lick a lotta pus.
                        (Finnish drinking song ...... Nnnnooooo).
On to the Awards:
SHAFFY wanted a drum roll & that saw the clothes dryer
spinning.
Shit-hot Run went to Virgin Run Setter PIMP, & he sure wasn't
gonna' put the old boot down - even wanted to present it 
to Leah in bed.
Shit-house Run winner REAR ENTRY - closed the pub down.
Tight Arsed Prick to BAD HEAD JOB - well new shoes would 
                               be just the same after 3 runs.
Spectacle - DIMWIT for his superb catch at the cricket.
Piss-pot - BITCHFACE - couldn't remember many.
Best Club Person - SHAFTED for tremendous support for the
                 GM, BBQ & Trailer etc.
                              (Bullshit, bullshit .......... ).
ROWDY had us spare a thought for MRS D's Dad's recent 
passing, & went on to present his Pot Calls The Kettle Black.
A few nominations, SILIC 3, BITCHFACE 1, NUTCRACKER 1
& BENTNOSE 1, but the winner is MRS D - the drink taken by
SQUIZZY in her absence.
They tried to call FOOTLICKER Nutlicker, but RA D&C wasn't 
having a bar of that. Some said he came again, but D&C said,
"he cums everyday lately".
Then to the Bill of Fare - mini sausage rolls with sauce to 
start, lovely bol & pasta, cake & TRENCH's balls, all ably
prepared by both Hosts.

Next week's run - 1927 - AGM at Buninyong Football/Netball
Club, Cnr Cornish & Forest Sts.