20 - 8 - '18          Run 1893          The Stag

Hash 23 for the HER FANNY run with the FASCINATion of 
Learmonth. DIMWIT got us underway calling reverence, as
the Grand Master stepped up to welcome everyone. 
FASCINATOR told us that HER FANNY was unwell, so, from
us all, get well HER FANNY. He said that the run was all 
washed out, so we'll see how far the whinging takes us. 
There's a Drink-stop 'with something special', & beware,
there might be some dogs on the loose. SHAFFY asked if
there was any run he hadn't fucked up yet. "It was marked in 
yellow, red & blue, & go left down at the corner". That turned 
out to be the 'other' left (the one you hold the knife in !!), as 
we had to turn right. Turn right we did, then up the hill out the
back, down to the Lake's edge, & along to the Drink-stop
with the American touch - Miller's beer & a shot of Jim Beam - 
all in tribute to FASCINATOR's friends (past). 
At the Circle, BAD HEAD JOB received the Perpetual Horn
(BITCHFACE & NUTCRACKER !!), & the expensive cup 
with zeros. 
                 (Get a life life life ...... ), then BITCHFACE & 
           REAR ENTRY were out for not knowing the words.
                                  (You're stupid ...... ).
BITCHFACE was Stand-in Screw (SHAFTED thought 
Slip in Screw), & promptly reminded FASCINATOR that
pneumonia was no excuse for HER FANNY. She asked 
that with no trail left, was it actually a run anyway??
Then the limerick - "Fanny's just a nice word for cunt".
                          (Shitty trail ............. ).
Sergeant SHAFTED's 1st charge - for DIMWIT - being aptly 
named, having his run from the Athletic Brewery, since it's 
been splashed all over The Courier. 
                 (There's a game called 20 toes ......... )
HALF A BAR was next (direct from Kenya), whether he had 
cash for the Farmer's Donation Jar, & SILIC left a bit of small 
change.
Sniffycunt Runs for DIMWIT 52, QUICKDICK 60, FASCINATOR
80, CHRIS CROS 910 & NORMAL 1099 (ready for next run).
                    (Give us an A ........ from MASTABAIT).
It was HER VAG's 33rd Birthday. 
                    (Hashy Birthday fuck you .......... ).
ROWDY charged FOP for leaving the football so early at the
weekend, on Geelong's best day ever, & MASTABAIT tipped
9 out of 10 winners.
HALF A BAR charged fuckin' REAR ENTRY since the fuckin'
bar flys had been in conversation with fuckin' Jean behind the 
fuckin' bar. She said "You're still working at your age??"
                     (U.G.L.Y. you're ugly ..... ).
SHAFTED charged FASCINATOR for "no trail, 3.5k & 
should've been a live Hare".
Look out for the photos of SHAFFY 'shafting' MRS DICKHEAD
from behind, that caused the Grand Old Duke of York
comment, "& when he was only half-way up, he was neither 
up nor down".
NORMAL gave himself the Kilimanjaro charge, & then the old
dickheads, MASTABAIT, GLIDER, SS & REARY had a drink for 
standing in the Fishy Corner, & not the designated Old Fart
corner. Of course, there wasn't enough beer in the pub for
"when one dickhead drinks .......... "
                   (They're the meanest ........... ).
MRS D charged FASCINATOR for having his 'metro sexual
beer', then NUTCRACKER for being on her phone at the 
circle, & BITCHFACE for having (thanks SHAFFY), ten-ants
& not white ants!!
      (DIMWIT chimed in with the Hash Hymn - 'Swing Low' 
                           for the down down song).
SILIC charged QUICKDICK for saying, "not another fuckin' 
jug", then PEBBLES to FASCINATOR for no photo of 
HER FANNY (the car!!), but a photo of the motor bike.
                    (Hymn, hymn, fuck hymn ........... ).
NORMAL charged his chauffeur MASTABAIT, for bringing 
him to Hash very week in the Hilux, when everyone
shit-cans Toyota. 
                    (There's a game called 20 toes .......... ).
SPARTACUS took a charge for giving his crook arm a
work-out, QUICKDICK for wearing his work beany to Hash,
& SHAFTED for his exceptional Hash Gear.
                           (Oughta be .............. ).
DIMWIT's zinger (during a great value Pub Meal & no 'line' 
on the wine glass), ....... The chicken rolled in the dirt once 
he'd crossed the road ..... he was a dirty double crosser!!

Next week's run - 1894 - Hare DIMWIT, Athletic Club. TBC.