Run # 2114, 17 October 2022.
Bent Nose from Creswick
It’s time… to use words to annoy the Prince of Pomposity, irregardless of whether they’re real.
Pusbucket welcomed all to the great area of Creswick, noting it as the birthplace of Norman Lindsay and John Curtin. Welcomes back to the area included Pebbles, Squizzy, and Rear Entry nominating himself for a beer for the second time in 3 weeks. (Get a life)
The birthday club was out in full swing again, with Mrs Dickhead, Boner and Wee Problem (she’s not here, but luckily Juscum bought the box she came in). (Hashy Birthday)
Then came the auspicious moment. The passing of the perpetual horn from one 1000 runner to the next. Firstly, Bad Hair Day, who held the horn for approximately 7 years, passed the horn to Criss Cross. And, almost as if to foreshadow Liz Truss, no sooner had he gained the title, Criss Cross passed the horn on to Lois Lane. (What a wank)
The raging Campaspe took centre stage. She “full up to here” and “spread far and wide”. The consensus was that the map just looks like a blob. The run started by going up… and then up… and then up. And then it went down and ran along a creek. Campaspe stated that we saw Kangaroos, which was a bonus and found our way back to a good drink stop… which smelt strongly of fertilizer. (Shitty trail)
Spencer Hocking came forward as the only sergeant from now on. He informed us that, if Rear Entry notes down more runs, he’ll be the next 1000 runner, and if he sits on the horn, he’ll have a rear entry. (B.I.M.B.O)
Precious and Pink Bits came out the front because Immaculate Conception wasn’t here (luckily we had the box he cums in) and they’d love to have a beer with Duncan. Campaspe then came out the front after the radio informed hash that she was going down. (Wiggle of her ass)
Nummy was then charge for brining a virgin runner the prior week but not being able to make her cum again. Precious was charged for proposing she be called Red Breast rather than Red Chest. (No no no)
Pusbucket was then charged for not saying where the drink stop was, which forced Tommy Half a Bar and Boner to walk half the walk. (What a wank)
Pebbles was charged for doing his 11th marathon. Precious then joined him for pointing out that, between the two of them, they had done an average of 5 and a half marathons each. Bent Nose joined for his similarly herculean effort of riding 55kms to set a 3km run. (Fuck hymn)
Nutcracker was the next charge. Having arrived at the drink stop, she asked who Master Bait was. Someone then told her it was “Bait” to which she responded “oh… Master Bait”. Juscum was then applauded for her heroics, having kicked a rock out of the way so that Squizzy wouldn’t fall over it on the run. (Finnish drinking song)
Fascinator then told the age old “kick in the nuts vs childbirth” joke. Rear Entry was then charged for spilling 3 beers at the pub and trying to deflect the blame. He then tried to change the subject by talking about socks. Pusbucket charged Rear Entry while he was out the front. Rear Entry lent Silic a couple of bucks a few month ago and hasn’t seen him since. Money well spent. (Why was he born so beautiful)
Boner was charged because Nutcracker and Mountie walked around the corner to see a lone Boner with all of his friends. (Mrs Murphy)
Boner then led a chorus of Swing Low Sweet Chariot. (Swing Low)
Rear Entry was the final charge for not knowing the words to the mime. (This is your down down song).
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