Sharon Olsen

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RUN #2076, 14 February 2022

Hare: Plucka – Location: Union Jack Lane, Buninyong

Although I didn’t get to see the final numbers that signed the book, by my head count we had a great turn out and around 40 hashers gathered at Union Jack Lane in Buninyong for run 2076. As it was Valentine’s Day, this run was themed as a red dress run with donations being collected for the McGrath Foundation ($290 was raised). With most of us dressed in red, we took off on a 4.5km run that was predominantly uphill for the first third of the run heading north along Geelong Road. We then looped around passing Ballarat Bird World and passing through the back of De Soza Park to the DS on Russell St. Hash circle was held in the reserve adjacent to Union Jack Lane and we finished off the evening with a plentiful feed of pre-ordered burgers/fish n chips.

Hash Circle began with the return of Mountie’s Moot that had been taken and regally redecorated. Her Vaj, considered to be the most royal, was asked to hold the Moot. Mountie began with a joke about Valentine’s Day gifts. Fascinator had bought Her Fanny a Mercedes and a diamond necklace while Pallbearer had bought Plucka slippers and a dildo. Fascinator said, “if she doesn’t like the merc, she’ll like the necklace” while Pallbearer said, “if she doesn’t like the slippers, she can go f%@k herself” . Mountie then awarded the following scores: Venue 20, Terrain 20, Marking -20 (most arrows were too close to the HH except for the one we needed where we all went the wrong way), Drink Stop 20 (simultaneous climax of walkers and runners and Deep Heat even made it to the DS), Groovy Factor 40 (NBCL not calling trail when out the front of the group). Total Score: 80.  Shitty Trail  .

Dr Death’s absence was mentioned and if one sergeant drinks, all sergeant’s drink, so Shafted scored a down down. Nummy then charged Bent Nose and Campaspe, as Bent Nose stole Nummy’s chips and Campaspe slapped her on the arse. Then if one Dr drinks, all Dr’s drink, so Rowdy and QD stepped up. Immaculate Conception was then charged for taking a day off work for the superbowl, but apparently not for Valentine’s Day and Mountie charged Nutcracker for stealing her Moot so that she has had no sex all week.  Give us an A  .

Bad Hair Day and Deep Heat were then called to the front to allow Deep Heat to drape his beard on Bad Hair Day’s head, such that he appeared to have hair.  He’s the Meanest  .

Mrs D then charged Mountie as she has never met anyone since 1975 that is so into bush. There were then comments that Plucka’s bush smelt like eucalyptus and that there were a couple of cockatoo’s in it. Nummy then charged Dim Wit for his tattoo (scar) which was followed by the comment that Nutcracker has a gash too.  Mrs Murphy  .

Bent Nose then charged Fergie for missing out on a beer at the DS, after Normal was seen to take the last beer. There were then various accusations of who took more than one drink. Fergie then charged Half a Bar for taking too long to get here as he followed Google, not Shafted instructions. Bent Nose then charged NBCL who was out the front of the running pack but not calling trail. He also noted that a young fella (not hasher) passed him towards the end of our run and was heard to say, “keep going, you’re doing a good job”. There were then charges from Mrs D for Spencer, but I didn’t catch why and a charge from Nummy for BF and Half a Bar because his clothes should only be worn BF nowhere.  They Ought to Be  .

Precious then charged Half a Bar and Spencer because Spencer was behind in his Grog Master duties and Half a Bar was missing out on his comments about sniffy runs. This was followed by a joke about cross eyed sheep . Teflon then announced that he and Gilf will be attending the Not the Nash Hash and will pick up the goody bags for our hashers.  Do Your Tits hang Low  .

Fascinator then attempted an audio gag for D&C and Nutcracker, but we couldn’t hear the song on his phone, and it was decided that audio gag’s just don’t work .  You’re Stupid  .

While we were waiting for dinner to arrive, Dim Wit was then called to tell us a joke  and Shafted attempted to teach us how to play the leaf. Mountie then charged NBCL for a comment made last week,  God save the Queen  , where NBCL was bending over and said, “probably not the best thing to do outside St Alypius”.  Give us an A  . Final charges were then made to Dim Wit and all the pedos.

Next weeks run was then announced, Big Dog will be the hare and the run will be held from Codes Forrest Road in Glen Park. Further details TBA.

Nutcracker thanked everyone for donating to the McGrath Foundation and Pauline was awarded for getting his nips out in his lovely red dress.  His One Skin  . There was a further announcement regarding Glider’s upcoming Memorial Run, where final numbers are needed asap.  Here’s to Glider  .

Next Week’s Run – Monday 21 February 2022 – Hare: Big Dog – Location: Codes Forrest Road, Glen Park