Jason Kelly

Sovereign H3 - Members Only

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BH3 Run 2023 (Yes, we skipped a few run numbers) – Market Hotel – Lois Lane and Mrs D

A total of 34 Hashers assembled at the Market Hotel for this week’s run, with 16 runners and 13 walkers setting off into Vic Park. Not far into the run we were treated to the first of 3 drinks stops, situated halfway up Gillies St, and included “Champagne Spiders” (champagne and ice-cream). From there we kept heading North and found the second DS containing “Jelly Shots” at the POW memorial. Onward home through the centre of Vic Park, the 3rd and final DS had an abundance of cold drinks and snacks, though Just Cum upended the tray of the remaining Jelly Shots and there were calls for her to not finish them all off.

Back at the Market we assembled for the circle out in the back beer garden, and after a 15-minute wait we were finally joined by the GM. Donuts welcomed back Immaculate Conception, Her Vagesty and Spencer Hocking  They’re the meanest 

Bent Nose called both Hares to stand front and centre, then proceeded to stand between them (Rowdy later charged him for “Splitting Hares”). His Screw began “It was reassuring to go on a Vic Park run where there was not a Paedo to be seen. Three drinks stops was definitely above and beyond expectations and, even more impressive was the two simultaneous climaxes of runners and walkers arriving together.” Score: “33% = the percentage of simultaneous climaxes that didn’t happen due to the runners ignoring an On Back”  Shitty Trail 

Sergeant Quick Dick began by charging Shafted for sitting in the circle, and then charged Rowdy and Pebbles for barging through the doorway whilst QD was politely standing back and allowing other customers to enter the Pub.

Other charges from before the run were Dumb n Dumber for injuring his knee on an escalator, and Num Num who said it was actually a shark attack.  No No No, Bad Bad Bad 

Charges from the run:

DnC had asked QD what the barcode on his t-shirt meant, he replied that it was from “1984”. DnC, who isn’t familiar with the Orwellian classic, responded, “Gee that’s a long time ago”

Shafted was heard on the run saying, “Plucka, come over here and feel these plums”.

Mrs D also charged Plucka who, at the first DS, asked: “Is there anything else available other than port, champagne, ice-cream or beer”. This was rebounded to Mrs D because there was no bottle opener for the beer.  There’s a game called 20 toes 

Just Cum was then charged for knocking everything over at the DS, and BP was charged for texting on the run….

Then Charges were abruptly halted and the Circle disbanded because dinner had been served.

Big Dog was due to host next week’s run, however, the new COVID outbreak put paid to that, with all of Vic now in Stage 4 lockdown the run has been cancelled. Fingers cross restrictions will be lifted on Wednesday night, allowing the 2020th run to go ahead next weekend.