Run 1960, Hare Shazza, from the Park Hotel.
A good crowd of Ballarat Hashers gathered at the Park Hotel to enjoy the deflowering of our latest virgin run setter, Shazza. The RA turned on a really shit evening, ridiculously cold for a global warming Southern Hemisphere December, and when reverence was called most put on an extra layer of clothing. Haemorrhoids was gracing the bar, but refused to join in, while Fluid Movement attended and joined in enthusiastically.
The run got off to an interrupted start, there being a traffic jam from all angles at the servo on the corner of Sturt and Gillies selling unleaded for 105 cents, and gas for 40 cents. Word had got around, and the lights seemed to skip "walk" for about 3 cycles. Trial wandered past Loretto, where another log jam of schoolgirls had the Bill jamming his pants. Couldn't wipe the smile off his face.
NBCL then demonstrated what a nice bloke he is by helping the Loretto rowers get their tinny out of the Lake, only to spoil it by inviting them all to pre season training for Redan FC. He almost had us fooled. Then through fairyland, back past the trout hatchery, through Prince Of Wales Park and Insignia Estate to the drinkstop at the Arch coffee shop. Overall not a bad effort for a first try.
Back at the pub, we had a continuation of last week's dummy spitting. Glider was back, but refused to join the circle initially as he was eating his dinner. Exit has no such issues. Plucka didn't quite make the circle, nor will she make her own run next week. Her Vag also left early (leaving virginal Shazza in the care of Mr Floppy). Most were left thinking, "WTF??"
Anyway, welcomes back to Fluid Movement, Squizzy (who missed the run), GILF, and Exit (No, no no, Bad, bad bad...)
Shafted had a field day with the 'virgin theme' ; made the most of the traffic lights being red, "Blood red, then the green light, everything was all white". He missed most of the run himself, but made up for it with his best Madonna impersonation ("Shazza virgin, set a run for the very first time"), then cool as you like transitioned into 'Smooothe FOPerator'. He managed to find some debris from the Spilt Milk event on the weekend, Shazza eventually identified the contraband.. SHITTY TRAIL
Fascinator piped in with his now obligatory "I might have fucked up".
Mountie, 1960, OCP available for the first time. Mistakes Pimp, Squizzy and Her Vagesty charged. FOP admitted "you'll do, Shazza: and both got a drink for their troubles.
Lois and BF Pauline were charged for their impending absence (Fuck off, Ya c*nts...), then Lois remained due to her reply to "so you'll be away for 2 months?" - looking panicked, "No, 8 weeks".
Mountie got a drink for the "Mounties Baseball club" sign spotted on the run, Snag for his eponymous urinal sign in the Gents. D&C charged Nummy as the Religious Adviser for the shitty weather, then had to drink herself for her NEW SHOES.. NBCL had a drink for the pink lipstick spotted on his lips before the run (now where did that come from?), then another one for liking his woman on all 4s. (ar sole, ar sole, a soldier i will be..)
In the absence of Dimwit, the 'if your dick was as hard as your elbow' gag went down to general amusement.
The circle stopped abruptly there, due to the impending serving of dinner sometime in the next 20 minutes. Priorities.
Next week's run is (I think) from the Buninyong Gardens, hare (i think) Criss Cross.
Meals when served were quite tasty, Shafted found a delicous Unwin wine for all to share, and the evening ended quite happily.
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