MATTHEW GIBNEY

Run 1934 Bait & Normal @ Grant St Grapes Hotel.

A large crowd gathered in the cold and gloom of the fabulous East, to join The Committee and the Hares in celebrating a wonderful event:

sesquicentenary
/ˌsɛskwɪsɛnˈtiːn(ə)ri,ˌsɛskwɪsɛnˈtɛn(ə)ri/
noun
1.
the one-hundred-and-fiftieth anniversary of a significant event.

Original inaugural runners attended (Morton, Dirty Dick) as well as elder statesmen (Sunshine Slit, Glider, Stubby) to wish Dazed and Confused all the best; perhaps taking the longest time EVER to go from run number 1 to run number 150. But more of that later.

SS was so excited he raided his supply of washed, ironed and carefully folded H3 Tshirts to gift to new runner Orri. Alas, Orri has no sense of occasion, and decided to not attend. His Tshirts have returned to the suitcase from whence they came.

The runners wound their way to the Eureka flag roundabout (as is fitting for an auspicious occasion) and did their duty, then met the short cutting walkers at the first drink stop (flagon muscat, warming on a cold night). The walkers took the short flat route to the crown larger and home brew (excellent, thanks Croc) drink and chip stop, the runners toughed it out up and down hills and through the haunted SMB campus. All arrived safely, including an apparition of Butt Fork, who appeared out of BF nowhere, then was gone in the click of her fingers. The Bill and Plucka sauntered into the drink stop a little later looking wet, flushed and happy.

Down Downs in the bar; Welcome back to the disputed inaugural runner (confirmed by SS, disputed by Bent Nose) Dirty Dick, who has aged as well as his name might suggest. And as one Dick drinks, all dicks and inaugural runners drink. ("Give me a Dick...") Welcome back also to the bra (thanks Precious), Donuts, and Criss Cross, GILF and Stubby ("As I was walking through the woods...")
BHD, Mrs D, Half a Bar also ("they oughta be publicly...")

Screw Shafted again forgot to screw the run. He digressed into back alleys, covering up before entering (no stealthing either), institutional anal sex (only after he asked the Billy Goat to kneel), and reminiscence about the African Red Dress run/shirt debacle. Normal refused to take offence, and Bait failed to fit into his shirt. (S H I T T Y T R A I L)

Sergeant Mountie frocked up again, this week adding an ACB beanie to her ensemble. Her homework done, she charged Glider for being the only one present at the opening of the Shrine of Remembrance in 1934, although he doesn't remember it. Bitch Face got one for being Tasmanian, like the then PM Joe Lyons, Fascinator the Fuhrer charge, along with anyone with a Jewish surname. All Peters were up as Peter Pan won the Melbourne Cup. The first ute in Australia led to a charge for all with a uterus (and that includes you Normal). Donald Duck, > Plucka, Shirley Temple, > Precious, Loch Ness Monster, > Dirty Dick....and all dicks ("Do your tits hang low...He's the meanest, ...This is your down down song, ...What a wank")

Charges before the run: Plucka had dirty notes from the committee meeting, Shafted had a dirty napkin, Dirty Dick had a dirty number plate (RU1469), Bitch Face was dirty when her charge was ignored. (There's a game called 20 toes...)
Some banter I failed to understand regarding barbecues and busses, and a sight gag involving a stick figure with a dirty dick. A heart felt charge from the barflies welcoming two new members, Quick Dick and Head Hunter, Normal for going to Nepal, Criss Cross for falling off his bike, and Rowdy for wearing the Normal T shirt to the Normal run.

A good pub meal with the usual banter and red wine followed.

Next week, Queens Birthday, from the Queens Head.

Oh, and Dazed and Confused was belatedly recognised for her 150th sesquicentenary run, after most had departed. Well done, Maxi.