Run # 1996; COVID Run # 20; Hare – Campaspee from Alfredton Sports Ground #2
With the weather in mind, a proactive Campaspee set this week’s trail on the Thursday. This allowed our retired members to enjoy the 7.5km loop through the Alfredton wetlands/Vic Park prior to the weather tuning… and turn it did! Two inches of rain fell between Friday and Sunday turning the wetlands into a lake and the walking path into a river. The Hasher who set out on Saturday copped the worst weather seen at Hash since Precious’ 18th Birthday run. Fortunately, the diligence shown in marking trail meant that it was still visible after all that weather; a credit to this week’s Hare and lesson to those prior who were somewhat stingy in their trail markings.
Zoom circle # 22 – Present were: Spence, Fop, Her Vag (briefly), Donuts, Lois, Pauline, SS, Mountie, Pus Bucket (briefly), Mrs D, Campaspee, Rowdy, Bent, BP, Teflon, GILF, Num, Dumb, Fascinator, NBCL, Nutsy (+ Caleb), Fang, Bitch Face, Normal, DnC and Dim Wit.
The circle began with condemnation of the R.A. due to the shitty weather across the weekend. Fascinator said he’d had the weekend off and passed responsibility onto SS. SS responded that he’d done a stellar job as he’d created a record for the wettest Saturday this century.
There were suggestions surrounding how to have the book signed…
Bent (sarcastically) suggested to DnC “why don’t we write our names at the start?” Mountie responded (tersely) “Get off her back, tell him to get fucked DnC!”
Donuts … “Maybe last person should take a photo of the chalk names” … (how do you know if you’re the last??)
Bitch Face (continuing the sarcastic theme) “Why don’t people just SMS DnC?” Mountie (even more tersely) “Get fucked Bitch Face!”
Bent … “Why can’t DnC wait at the start of trail all weekend?” … Guess what Mountie said??
At 19:12 Donuts call for order and passed the floor to the screw
Bent Nose began with his excitement at the thought of screwing his first ever virgin. This excitement was extinguished when he was reminded that Campaspee had set a run earlier this year from the Park Hotel. Alas, poor Bent has still never been near a virgin (it was proposed that Bitch Face might still be a virgin, but she “definitely isn’t volunteering herself to Bent Nose”)
Bent described the trail marking as “par excellence” but was critical of the map posted on Facebook. Though the run wasn’t in the “Magnificent South East” the setting was “okay”; that was until the trail hit the back blocks of Alfredton where “every fucken house looks the same”. Bent thought the mundane architecture was doing his head in, as he thought he could hear a distant familiar voice; turned out to be Candida, Principal of Alfredton Primary, speaking over the school PA. The Guncotton Rail Trail was a novel aspect, as was the trip past the old saleyards. Having done the trail on Friday they managed to dodge the rain, however, the Sou’westerly wind nearly blew BP away. Final Rating = 7 on the Beaufort scale (see pic)
Sniffycunt runs
- BP-1200
- Her Vag 131 and Pebbles 565 (even though he was absent watching Collingwood)
Charges included:
Lois charged Pauline because he wore clean runners thinking that there won’t be any shiggy
Dumb charged Num; they did the run twice ended up getting lost
Lois charged Campaspee for setting a thoughtful trail which went past her house allowing her to take a dump on trail
DnC charged Dim Wit who offered to lead the way through the flooded trail, only to fall flat on his face.
Mrs D charged Nutsy for reaching into her bra to pull out a tissue. Nutsy was asked how many tissues she keeps down there, to which Bitch Face offered “She leaves them in the box” (“Coming from you?!?” was Nutsy’s response)
Lois said she uses socks instead of tissues in her bras
Lois charged Pauline as they had stayed dry during the run only to get drenched putting the caravan cover on when they got home (referred to as the RA’s revenge)
The question as to how christened Pauline was tossed around. Pauline believed that Rowdy was the RA; Rowdy has called for a DRS – consensus was that it may have been Deep Heat
Someone asked what the Collingwood scores were (WGAF)
Rowdy charged Mountie as she obviously doesn’t swallow (Lois’ joke; Q. “What do you call a hooker with a runny nose?” A. “Full”)
It appears that instead of swallowing Mountie rubs it in her hair “Something about Mary” style (see pic)
Just enough time left for a Dim Wit special; “What kind of Bees give milk?” (“BooBees”)
Next week’s run: Plucka from Fed Uni Mt Helen – more details to follow
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