RUN 1700 Venue: Five Ways Hare: SS 12 January 2015

Momentous occasion of the 1700^th Run of Ballarat Sovereign Hash warranted splashing out on little Savs and shouting drinks at Five Ways.  Anyone that didn’t know where that was just had to drive along White Swan Road until they found Billy Goat’s car; the pretty new one that is greeeeen (very green).

We gathered at the usual place trailer all set up with eskies of drinks on ice and had a couple to settle the nerves.  SS ran us OnOn over the road marked with burn-outs (not his), past the dirt bikes, into the moist forest that smelled of dank rubbish, down to the track along the cyclone fence past more rubbish dumps by the White Swan reservoir including piles of asbestos sheet. A bit of an exposé of the crap happening on the outskirts of town but a great run on a lovely evening.  The Drink Stop was back near the bitumen in the SShaggin wagon just in sight of the greeen machine.

There had been many lewd references about “Five Ways” to have “Little Boys” with Spencer Hockling called on to elaborate.  Lo and behold, surprise surprise! It was up to One Nutty Keeper of the Meat, Silic, who came up with a sixth way to have them; rolled in gravel and sprinkled with rotten gum leaves.  “It was all going right until it went wrong” he said.

We circleded around the HHH trailer to try the savs tucked neatly into Fluid Movement tight little moose burger buns and smothered in tomato and mustard sauces a la Jack style.

SOS and Little Evil were welcomed back., Inaugural runners and several old buggers had a drink with Hare SS, having attended 88% of all the Ballarat Sovereign Hash runs since formation, a formidable feat likely to send anyone footsore.

Heavy was looking forward to performing his long anticipated Danny Boy for SS Boy but had to tend to his gold boring job in Leonora so the tune was left to a cobbled together choir of Hash Rabble that has been imbibing the plentiful alcohol.   What a performance! Half a Bar was half a bar behind, Silic was half a bar behind Half a Bar and Rear Entry was bringing up the Rear way behind Silic.  This threw everyone else out of kilter so the scramble bikes going by sounded sweeter.  Anyway, Heavy and Rowdy will be asked to deliver the tune more succinctly and solemnly on their return. Start practicing doc.

Oh SS boy, the FISH, the FISH are calling
From GRAMMER BOATSHED, and AROUND ST PATRICK’S SIDE
The summer's gone, and all the FISH ARE LEAVING
Tis you tis you must walk while others ride.

But come ye back when FULL MOONS AT the LAKE SIDE
And when the WINDS ARE hushed and MUDEYES ON THE GO
AND YOU’LL BE There, in sunshine or in shadow
Oh SS boy, oh SS boy, FISHING’S HOOKED, you so………………..

……………………And I shall hear, your soft ON ON calls, around me…
And all my hash runs, will richer, sweeter be…
For you will talk…. Non-stop… in every cir…cle…
And tell of… the one’s that got away… to me.

Oh SS Boy, Oh SS Boy we… Love …you… So….

Seargeant Spence had plenty of lubed up chargers from all over the place as we slogged through the coopers and crownies. There was slagging off about tiling between our Tidy man and Bent, so proud of his fake chim-chimney? 

Rear Entry and Silic matched “a pair of arseholes” with “a parasol”. Bad Hair Day was engrossed in Fluid’s buns and found some amongst the dumped rubbish.  Spartacus showed off his yellow mini Romas.

Mars Cycle Classic winner, Heinrich Hemel Haussler should have been at HHH but sent renowned Cycle stuntman and Hitler Lookalike Pus Bucket to stand in for him.

Snag, having literally bitten the dust, had chipped teeth and bloody top lip scars looking like a little Hitler Mo.  Dangerous things those bikes. Even Criss Cross has unhandled his handle bars in favour of Dragon Boating.

Roll on to the latish On After  at Top Eureka for some tucker and lots more wine, so much that Fluid Movement splashed out and shared some around.

Next Week’s Run: Lois Lane’s Ladies Limp of the Hung Over Hash Tarts

Theme;  Half a Bars Buck’s Bang as Lois Lane looms LX

Venue; Kelly’s Lane in the Creswick Forest.  East off Creswick Road, up Kelly’s Lane. The ON ON in the bush will be like a mutt in a merkin. Keep looking till you find it.  Watch out for the Hash sign, The Bill’s green Car and follow the coloured ribbons. Dollar Drinks!!